"I don't know. Who do you have hiding in your pants?"
You can't spell "D'oh!" without O.
Unstoppable. White liquid shooting at Eli Manning's face is.
Is this better or worse for the Giants than Plaxico Burress getting shot in the leg?
Shouldn't be long now until Eli is the official endorser of this.
For years we have wondered if bobsledders wear boxers or briefs. Now we know.
From the bobsledding World Championships in Switzerland:
Dialogue as they headed down the track
"Do you feel a cold draft?"
"Of course. We're bobsledding."
"Oh. Right. I was afraid my pants had split and my big ass was sticking out."
Oh. By the way. Here is the U.S. women's bobsledding team. I can't wait to see their asses in Vancouver. For my money, the hottest ones are Jazmine Fenlator, Bethany Hart and Jamia Jackson. I just like their look. I guess it's my type.
If you watched Green Bay play the Cardinals on Sunday and found yourself wondering how the NFL's No. 2 ranked defense could get torched like that, wonder no more!
Defensive coordinator Dom Capers was asleep.
Well, we can't know for sure that he was asleep, you say. We can't see his eyes.
Okay. Fine. If that sudden jerk his whole body did wasn't because he snapped out of sleep, the only other option is that he had explosive diarrhea. Or maybe explosive diarrhea in his sleep.
Let's agree that sleep was the least embarrassing possibility.
And let's also agree that Dom Capers should be fired. For sleeping, for his tricky bowels, for his hair or for his terrible defense. Take your pick.
The sight of Andy Roddick apparently makes koalas want to knock feet? Hooves? Whatever. He makes them want to have sex.
Although chances are what really happened is they saw Roddick and thought of his wife, Ms. Brooklyn Decker.
That would get anyone in the mood.
Great video. But I don't think it's as great as another video of a famous American sportsperson who had an interview stolen by some animals, too.
Here is high school basketball star Sarah Palin:
You mate and then you die. Such is life.
It doesn't always have to be jokes around here. Now that Randy Johnson is retired, it's time to pay tribute to a baseball legend.
(Note: He also probably did some other stuff.)
This is a great campaign approach. And it just might work.
Although if it does, the entire Eastern Conference squad might end up being New Jersey Nets.
If you're interested, you can vote for the NBA All-Stars here. And there are Nets on the ballot. Really.
Fair warning. You might want to have some sort of receptacle on-hand to hold the contents of your stomach.
From Tuesday night's Texas A&M-Washington game. Washington won. Derrick Roland's tibia and fibula lost. Badly.
Papa John said everyone in attendance at the Louisville-Oral Roberts game last week would get a free pizza if he hit a shot from half court.
Chances are Papa John didn't have to buy everyone a pizza. Rick Pitino only eats at Porcini. (I'm sorry. I meant "eats." And, wait Rick Pitino, Italian food and Oral all combined in the same video? It's amazing it's SFW.)