Filed Under » San Francisco Giants

A still-glowing Eli Manning was pulled aside at Giants practice today and informed by head coach Tom Coughlin that it was the San Francisco Giants who won the World Series, not the New York Giants.

"I didn't want to crush him," said Coughlin, who left his quarterback in tears. "But I just couldn't let him go on thinking he won a championship. I know the Giants name was very confusing for him. He's a simple kid. But I need his focus on the New York Giants. The football Giants."

Those close to the quarterback said he was overjoyed about the Giants' win because he felt it would permanently quiet his critics thanks to having one more title on his career resume than his big brother, Peyton.

Coughlin accepted some of the blame for his quarterback's confusion about Giants.

"When he was a rookie, he was even more naive and scared than he is now, if you can believe it," said the coach. "So I helped him get braver by telling him that the guys on the team were actual giants — actual giants who would protect him and keep him safe. That's the only way I got him on the field. Apparently he still thinks all giants are the same."

San Francisco Giants ace Tim Lincecum stepped up with an epic performance in Game 5 of the World Series to clinch a championship for the Giants, but slightly messed up a planned postgame interview where he was to say he was going to Disneyland.

"Tim Lincecum, you've just won the World Series. What are you going to do now?" asked FOX's on-field reporter Ken Rosenthal.

"I'm going to Amsterdam and I'm going to get really f**king high, man!" said Lincecum. "What did you think I was gonna do, dumbass?"

A stunned Rosenthal then quickly and nervously grabbed the next Giant he saw, pitcher Barry Zito, and asked the same question: "Barry Zito, you've just won the World Series. What are you going to do now?"

"I'm going to to Amsterdam with Timmy!" said Zito. "We're smoking primo sh*t 'til spring training! Woooooooooo!"

Rosenthal then pulled Giants manager Bruce Bochy aside, who said he was also going to Amsterdam and was openly smoking a joint on the field.

"Well," said Rosenthal, tossing it back up to Joe Buck and Tim McCarver. "Euro Disney is not too far of a flight from Amsterdam. They're probably just making a quick layover. That's what they mean."