Promote him to the NFL.
He seems too close to Buster Posey to call a fair game.
Scottish people know as much about the NFL as replacement refs.
President Obama awarded the Whistle of Freedom to Ed Hochuli at a White House ceremony this morning.
"America could not love and respect you more," the president said. "Unfortunately, like so many in this country who do outstanding work, your contributions were not fully appreciated until we could no longer enjoy them. We took you for granted. But on this day, I and all of the American people say that Ed Hochuli is a national treasure."
The Whistle of Freedom is the nation's highest referee honor. It is presented to individuals who have made especially meritorious contributions to the national football interests of the United States and world officiating competence.
Hochuli said it was a great honor.
"This is something I never even dreamed of," said the locked out official. "It truly humbles me. But then I remember I'm built like a Greek god and I become less humbled. But it's still neat."
"You suck balls."
"You're the suckiest."
"Is this going? Did it beep? I don't know if it beeped yet. I want to tell him that he sucks when it beeps."
"I don't know if this is your real voice mail, but if it is it's great that you give fans access to you like this. Also, you suck."
"You better never come to Green Bay, Wisconsin. And not for the usual reasons most people don't want to go to Green Bay. But because we'd beat you up long before you got bored and left."
"Hi, Roger. It's Gary Bettman. Thanks for making me look less sucky."
"How are parents supposed to look at their kids and say that there is justice and goodness in the world?" said Green Bay quarterback Aaron Rodgers, whose team lost on a last-second pass by the Seattle Seahawks that appeared to be intercepted by Packers safety M.D. Jennings in the end zone. "There was hope. Hope for humanity. Hope for the world. But then they said Golden Tate caught a pass he really didn't."
The call pushed the Packers to 1-2, one game back in the NFC North division with only 13 games to play. Most schools and many business across the country have closed for the week to give families time to heal together and talk through what happened.
President Obama spoke to the nation from the Oval Office minutes after the game ended and urged calm.
"At times like these there are no answers," he said. "We can only rely on our faith and our sense of community and hope they can pull us through."
The president said he has already received countless calls from global leaders offering condolences and support.
"Today we are all Americans," said British prime minister David Cameron. "The refs really messed up the end of that game. It's outrageous."
#10 The One Who Looks Like Clint Eastwood
Rugged. His advanced age suggests he is experienced in the ways of lovemaking. No doubt he's a staunch conservative everywhere but in bed. We'll call you dirty Harry.
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#9 This Guy
What's that peaking out of your sleeve there, sir? A bicep. Damn, you got a body on you, huh? What's your full-time job: People's Sexiest Man Alive?
Frustration with the NFL's replacement officials reached a fever pitch Sunday night when referee Carl Howard accidentally got in the way of a Joe Flacco pass in the end zone. Howard picked up the ball and then signaled for a touchdown, crediting himself with a key score in the Baltimore's 31-30 win.
Patriots' coach Bill Belichick immediately threw a challenge flag, but after a 17-minute conference with his fellow officials, Howard explained that the ruling on the field could not be challenged because Howard's forward progress was stopped at the time he scored the touchdown.
"It's one thing for them to not understand the rules," Belichick said. "But making up rules on the spot rules that allow THEM to score touchdowns is insane."
Howard normally works as a manager at a local Hardee's and serves as a volunteer referee for a pee-wee league. This was just his third NFL game, and he admitted that the nuances of the league's complex rulebook have been slow to come.
Howard's touchdown was the most egregious mistake on a night that saw the Patriots flagged twice for "excessive running" and the Ravens have a field goal waved off due to "illegal hands to the hips".
It was rigged! He took a dive!