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VIDEO: The Sixers are Far Worse at Singing Than Basketball

They need to take someone who isn’t tone deaf No. 1. Continue Reading →
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Sixers GM Caught Putting Poison in His Players’ Water Bottles

Philadelphia 76ers general manager Sam Hinkie was caught on camera putting poison in his players’ water bottles today while the team was practicing. A reporter took video of Hinkie ... Continue Reading →
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Sixers Scouting 7th Grade Basketball Star with Scoliosis

Sixers general manager Sam Hinkie has dispatched his scouts to see 7th grade basketball player Andrew Joelle, a 6-foot center from Dover, Delaware, who has scoliosis.  Continue Reading →
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Depressing Sixers’ Postgame Quotes from After Every Game of Their Historic Losing Streak

Loss #1: January 31st, 125-99 vs. Hawks “It was the poorest performance of our season tonight. The effort wasn’t there.” — head coach Brett Brown Loss #2: February ... Continue Reading →
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VIDEO: The Sixers Even Suck at Getting Their Fans Free Big Macs

A love of cheesesteaks and Big Macs. The people of Philadelphia are healthy eaters. Continue Reading →
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VIDEO: How Every Play Looks When the Sixers and Bucks Share a Court

Look what tanking has Wroten.  Continue Reading →
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VIDEO: This Play is the Official Play of the 2013-2014 Philadelphia 76ers

Tanking this hard takes more work than trying to win. Continue Reading →
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VIDEO: Joey Crawford is Sick of NBA Mop Boys Half-Assing It

Joey Crawford probably makes citizen’s arrests using his whistle.  Continue Reading →
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Sixers Fire Head Coach After Season-Opening Victory

The Philadelphia 76ers fired head coach Brett Brown this morning, one day after he coached the team to a shocking season-opening victory over the defending, two-time NBA champion Miami ... Continue Reading →
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PICTURE: Sixers Fan Extremely Excited by Sixers Beating the Heat

Frat bros being frat bros. Continue Reading →
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Rejected 2013-2014 Philadelphia 76ers Promotional Slogans

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Andrew Bynum Posts Late-Night Facebook Rant on His Injury

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Andrew Bynum is Still Experiencing Major Hair Issues

At least his knees aren’t the worst part of his body. Continue Reading →
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Sixers Winning Thanks to Good Bowel Movements

Everybody poops, not everybody hoops. Continue Reading →
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Andrew Bynum’s Hair is Worse Than His Knees

It’s the worst Sixers thing since Shawn Bradley. Continue Reading →
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Spencer Hawes’ Tweets Unable to Sway Presidential Election

Despite months of anti-Obama and pro-Romney tweets, Philadelphia 76ers' backup center Spencer Hawes was unable to swing the election in favor of the Republican candidate. Romney ... Continue Reading →
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Philadelphia 76ers’ T-Shirt Cannon

The Pentagon wishes it could shoot t-shirts with this much power. Continue Reading →
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Kid Has Preseason Sixers Fever

The regular season will depress him soon enough. Continue Reading →