Filed Under » Pau Gasol

Lakers star Kobe Bryant claims teammate Pau Gasol was not brutally murdered and, in fact, immediately flew home to Spain following Los Angeles' season-ending loss to the Oklahoma City Thunder.

"Yeah, I've heard the crazy rumors, too," said Bryant, wiping blood off of his face with a towel while speaking to Oklahoma City police. "I guess because a few people claim they heard screams and saw me attacking Pau with an ax? I don't know. People say crazy things. But, no, right after the game ended, Pau headed to the airport and flew home. He said he was going there forever and would never be back."

Bryant then picked up his blood-soaked axe and held it menacingly in the direction of his teammates: "Didn't Pau say that, guys," Bryant said to them. "Tell the good officers."

Bryant's Lakers teammate, crying and in shock, nodded their heads in agreement.

David Stern today nixed the 2008 trade of then-Memphis Grizzlies forward Pau Gasol to the Los Angeles Lakers in exchange for Kwame Brown, Javaris Crittenton, Aaron McKie, the draft rights to Marc Gasol and first round picks in 2008 and 2010.

"I didn't feel the trade was fair for the small-market Grizzlies," said Stern. "I mean, looking back, they really got fleeced. So I am voiding the deal for basketball reasons."

The commissioner's decision attaches a huge question mark to the last four NBA seasons, in which Gasol and the Lakers made three NBA Finals and won two.

"I guess that means the Lakers lose those two championship," said Stern. "Or not. I don't know. Maybe we could have a computer simulate those seasons or ask some kid to do it on NBA 2K. There are obviously a lot of questions and I don't have the answers. When you start meddling in things, this is what happens, okay? Just let me meddle."