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Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.

This happened years ago when I was in middle school gym class, but one of my best friends got a noticeable erection while the gym teacher was demonstrating a wrestling move on him.

- Kyle

Tuesday night I'm at the gym with my workout buddies. A guy listening to his iPod was working beside us on the leg press machine. Late in his set, a few loud, chirping farts slip out. I guess he didn't hear them until the end, when he suddenly looked up with a shocked/embarrassed look on his face, saw everyone staring at him and got up, standing there for a second thinking what to do. Suddenly he grabbed the spray bottle near him, sprayed the seat where he was sitting, wiped it off and then walked away quickly with his head hung.

We appreciated the clean up effort, but unless he sharted, his wipe up didn't accomplish much.

- Jack

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.

So I'm in the locker room after a workout and that cheesy Just For Men commercial where the last gray-haired man on earth disappears. Without missing a beat after they say the "last gray-haired man on earth disappears" line, this old naked guy looks up at the TV and says: "I'm still f—king here you, jackasses." I laughed so hard it hurt.

- Zack

I usually go to the gym with my roommate, but he was out of town last week so I went by myself and worked in with this one guy. He seemed pretty cool and we got to talking about workouts. He said he rotates through three workouts: Day 1 is upper body, Day 2 is lower body and Day 3 is what he called "my FMs". At first I felt stupid not knowing what "FMs" are, but he kept referring to it so I finally asked.

He said: "Oh, FMs are your F**k Muscles — abs, lower back, hips and ass. For the ladies, you know?" I finished up my workout after that.

- Chris

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.

I was at a minor league game a few years ago and the beer guy came through our sparsely populated section. A lady a few rows ahead of us ordered some beers for her friends, starting drinking them and then tried to stiff the vendor, saying she didn't have enough money to pay what she owed. He was cool about it at first, telling her she could go to an ATM and pay him later, but she refused and then started getting verbally abusive with him. "Get a real job, you f—king loser," is one of the things I remember she said.

So eventually the vendor gives up and for the rest of the night when he came through our section he would say "Cold beer! Cold beer here!" Except when he got near that lady's row, he'd switch to "Cold bitch! Cold bitch here!" I hope he didn't get fired because it was hilarious.

- Jay

I was at a Braves vs. Reds game at Turner Field where I sat behind the center field wall. There was bunch of drunk guys a couple rows back heckling Reds centerfielder Drew Stubbs. They would yell, "Hey Stubbs, you suck! You're the worst centerfielder in all of baseball!" and other things that generally ruined the experience.

Finally, after one stood up and said: "Hey Drew Stubbs, could you do us all a favor and go back to Triple-A?", a little blonde girl stood up behind me, and she was no more than 6 or 7 years old. She turned to the drunk guy and says: "Hey Mister, could you do us all a favor and please be quiet?" The guys did as they were asked. Greatest. Thing. Ever.

- Bob

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.

Probably the most humiliating moment of my life happened at the gym.

It was in college and I was using the gym on campus. It was a Sunday afternoon and I decided to go to the gym because my girlfriend was hungover from a night out were her friends the night before. I worked in on the bench with another guy who was lifting alone and we got to talking. He goes into a story about his escapades out the night before and tells a story of this hot girl he hooked up with and how it led to a three-way. I wasn't interested, but whatever.

It turned out, based on his descriptions — specifically of piercing and also of a clover tattoo right beside the one girl's uh … area — that he had a three-way with my girlfriend and her roommate.

So, yeah, we broke up. She had no idea how I knew about what had happened. I just told her "I know a lot of stuff." I think it sounded less creepy at the time.

- Dan

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.

I was at a Yankees game where CC Sabathia was pitching. He wasn't pitching well and so my friend and I were heckling him. Moments after I yelled 'YOU SUCK, CC!!", the hot girl in front of me turned around and asked: "Who's CC?" I told her he was the pitcher.

She turned back around and I read the back of her Jersey: "SABATHIA 52."

- Matthew

Last season me and a few buddies were at the St. Louis Cardinals vs. Chicago Cubs game in St. Louis. A couple from Chicago were sitting next to us. The girl was a typical hot blonde, fun to look at but extremely dumb.

The Cardinals have the Gateway Arch cut into the centerfield grass. While watching the game she loudly says: "Awww … that's awesome they have a rainbow in their field!" Everyone around just sat there staring at her without saying a word.

- Nathan

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.

I was at an Arizona State University baseball games a couple weeks ago with my friend. Apparently it was Sorority night because it was packed with a bunch of Sorority girls. To our delight, they all decided to sit right behind my friend and I. About 2 innings into the game, we heard one of the girls behind us shout "Go baseball!"

My friend and I got up and found different seats.

- Nick

Last year I was attending a Red vs Marlins game in Florida and was sitting in right field. There was a fan that was heckling the Reds right fielder Jay Bruce all game by using Wikipedia and other sources to find out his high school and family names, etc.

Well, it was all fun and good until all of a sudden the fan yells: "Hey Jay Bruce your the worst LEFT FIELDER in baseball!" Without skipping a beat, Jay turns around asks who was yelling. The inning ends and he goes back to the dugout. As the Reds are coming back out onto the field, Bruce has something in his hand but I cannot figure out what it is.

Jay jogs over the the right field wall and hands the fan in the front row some kind of paper to pass back to the fan. I eventually get to see what it is and I start to laugh my ass off.

It was a piece of paper that was about two paragraphs long that address what every position was. An example was: "The guy throwing the ball is the pitcher." And at the end in all CAPS it says: "NICE TRY BUT I PLAY RF BUT IT'S OK MY 3 YEAR OLD NIECE HAD TROUBLE WITH THAT TOO."

The fan did not talk the rest of the game. Best sports memory of my life.

- Clayton

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.

Several years back I was at a Cubs game in the right field bleachers and Adam Dunn was playing RF for the Reds. In the midst of all the heckling going on a fan yells: "Hey Dunn, F—K YOU!" A lady with a small child yells at the fan: "Hey, buddy, show some respect. There are kids out here." The guy, without missing a beat, yells back: "I'm sorry … 'Hey MR. Dunn, F—K YOU!'"

- Rob

I was at the Yankees-Tigers game in Detroit and in front of me and my friends were a large group of guys and under-aged girls all getting drunk. The drunk guys behind them started yelling about Derek Jeter. One from the first group then stood up and started shouting back.

It quickly evolved into "I'll kick your ass!" "No, I'll kick YOUR ass!" They all ended up getting thrown out just before they started throwing punches.

What were they fighting about? What side of the state Jeter was from.

I was embarrassed to be near them.

- Tim

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.

I attend the University of Illinois, and a couple of years ago when Jeffrey Jordan (Michael Jordan's son) still played for the Illini, the players were having a dunk contest during Midnight Madness. Jeffrey at 6-foot-1 was participating, and throwing down monstrous dunks.

On one in particular, he must have been 40-inches off the ground and threw down a full windmill. As the crowd goes wild, the guy in front of me calmly leans over to his friend and says: "I bet he gets that from his Mom's side of the family."

I was laughing for the rest of Midnight Madness.

- John

I was at a Minnesota Vikings game when I was 7 or 8, and I was at the souvenir stand alone without my parents, and this obviously drunken, redneck, middle-aged man points out a cheerleader calendar to me, saying: "I bet you're getting that for later, aren't ya?"

I then bought a hat. He then shut up, and later, I saw two security guards escorting him out of the stadium. Karma's a bitch, you perv.

- Peter

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.

At my gym, there's this guy that always wears shorts, but never any type of underwear. How do I know this? Because when he uses the seated pec fly machine (located right in front of the pull-up bar that I use for a lot of my workouts), he spreads his leg and at least on ball will droop out onto the seat. After one long set at the machine, he got up to get some wipes to disinfect the seat. On the seat, there was one circle of sweat, exactly where his ball had been.

- Lee

I used to go to the local YMCA to work out because they have a pool and a basketball court. One day while swimming a few laps, an elderly gentleman was finishing up his set and climbed out the pool. He drops his shorts right there, rings them out into the pool and casually walks into the change room, just flapping in the wind.

Everyone's jaws drop as they look away in disgust. The lifeguard wasn't even fazed one bit as he looked up slowly from whatever he was reading, didn't even blink, and went back to reading. Judging by his reaction I assumed this was a regular occurrence.

No more YMCA for me.

- Rob

Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.

I'm a regular gym rat at my college gym, but all of my roommates are chubby and out of shape. One of them easily packed on the freshman 15 last year and probably another 5 or 10 the first semester of this year. He told me over winter break that his New Year's resolution was to lose some weight and start going to the gym with me.

So we get back and the first time I go he comes with me. I have him stretch with me and then we go off, I hit the bench and he goes on the treadmill. Five minutes later, he comes down from the upper deck where the treadmills are, and I counted him do 5 sit-ups on the incline sit-up. He then rushed himself off it, ran over to the trash can and booted for a couple minutes. He soon got a paper towel, wiped himself off, and walked over to me. He simply said "never again" before riding off into the sunset, leaving the gym forever.

- Ryan

I swear these events to be true.

I used to work out daily at a gym in Baton Rouge. I was using the wall climbing machine — it's is on a vertical track and the top constantly flips over to reveal more hand holds while the bottom rotates down to force you to climb faster.

I was on on the higher speed setting and my hand got clipped by the top of the machine which caused my ring finger to start bleeding profusely. I later found out I crushed the bone under my nail and needed stitches.

I hopped down from the machine as nonchalantly as possible to not draw attention and went to the bathroom to make sure my finger was still attached. A bunch of the local crowd of regulars marveled at the injury, as opposed to going to get help, until I asked them to contact the front desk.

After a few guys mentioned how tough I must have been for not yelling, one random 40-something dude I have never seen before marched in from behind the crowd. He was dressed in jeans and work boots and had an LSU cap from the 90's.

"Looks like they got you pretty good man. (delays to draw attention). Almost as good as they got me." (I have no idea who 'they' is … objects?)

He then raised his left hand to reveal a missing pinkie, an index missing the tip and a ring finger that was reduced to a nub. One guy grabbed his stomach and left.

"That's right. Two by four when I was working a job down in Slidell. Well, I hope you're ok man." He then walked away out of the bathroom and I have never seen him again at the gym.

I assumed he was waiting in the bathroom for months waiting to upstage someone's hand injury and finally had his moment and left.

- James