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Sad Pat Riley and Alonzo Mourning

The force is strong in Kevin Durant. Continue Reading →
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NBA Players Admit Fear Their Window of Opportunity Has Closed Barring Kevin Durant Playing Minor League Baseball

Young NBA stars from LeBron James to Blake Griffin admit concern that NBA titles are Kevin Durant's for the taking for the next decade or more. "He's so good, so clutch ... Continue Reading →
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It’s NBA Finals BINGO!

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Cleveland Always Votes Itself “Most Miserable”

They will not let Seattle come along and steal the soul-crushing misery Cleveland is famous for. Continue Reading →
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Official NBA Analyst/Expert Game Worksheet

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Honest NBA Finals Promotional Slogans

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America’s Wang is Inflamed

Penicillin is not clutch. Continue Reading →
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Washington Newspaper is Delightfully Smarmy About OKC Thunder

Their original headline was F–K DAVID STERN. Continue Reading →
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Oklahoma City Thunder Still Not Wildly Popular in Seattle

Someone doesn’t care to Thunder Up. Continue Reading →
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Turns Out New England Residents are Even Dumber than Floridians

Now they move on to the next round where Ohio waits. Continue Reading →
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Thunder Announce Kevin Durant Will Miss NBA Finals Due to Hugging-Related Injury

The Oklahoma City Thunder's dream season looks to be all but over before the team was even able to take the court for the NBA Finals. Thunder general manager Sam Presti announced ... Continue Reading →
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Portland Trail Blazers Fans Should Have Honked Twice

All of the honking actually blew out Greg Oden’s eardrums. Continue Reading →
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James Harden’s Inevitable Evolution

He’ll never play in away games unless he is medicated before the flight. Continue Reading →