The guy behind him decided to subtly ogle her butt.
Playlist March's Funniest Sports Videos
One is the loneliest skater.
1. Michael Jordan's NBA Executive Prank
Jordan the basketball player was not only regarded as his sport's greatest players, but also as one of its great minds. So it was assumed he would make a great team executive. Ha! That's where Michael Jordan the prankster stepped in.
First with the Wizards he drafted Kwame Brown No. 1 overall and made hilariously bad trades. Then he expanded his prank to Charlotte where he picked Adam Morrison and built a team that set an NBA record for the lowest winning percentage in history. Add all that to his Hitler mustache and ripped '90s jeans and Jordan the prankster is just as great as Jordan the basketball player!
2. Adidas' Camouflage and Neon Uniform Prank
So cruel. Yet so hilarious.
News Dr. James Andrews Unveils Superstar "FrankenAthlete" Made from Athlete Body Parts He's Collected Over the Years
"FrankenAthlete is the most physically perfect being ever created," said Andrews. "No single athlete could ever hope to defeat it."
Andrews has done surgeries during his career on Michael Jordan, Adrian Peterson, Jack Nicklaus, Robert Griffin III, Bo Jackson and countless other great athletes. He says he has combined parts and DNA he removed from all of them to grow FrankenAthlete.
"If any of my past patients have a problem with what I have done, I'd let them know that they agreed to this," said Andrews. "They need to read the fine print on their surgery paperwork a little better."
"I realize I'm 47 years old and haven't played in 17 years," said Neely, who was forced to retire in 1996 due to injuries, "but Chris Chelios was still a serviceable player at this age and I'm nothing if not rested. Plus, whatever I might be lacking in speed or skill, I'll make up for it in wanting it more than anyone else."
Neely's career was cut short by a chronic injury to a hip that was initially damaged on a check by Penguins defenseman Ulf Samuelsson. But Neely says he has no hard feelings.
"Ulf isn't on the team anymore. And I simply want to win a Cup," he said. "I always was jealous of how Ray Bourque got to go to the Avalanche to win a championship. This is my shot to do that."
Shero says he is not sure he has a place for Neely.
Not being able to skate: the first skill of all great goalies.
News Streaking Penguins Reportedly Just One Win Away from Getting Acknowledged on Twitter by LeBron James
"I got word tonight that if we win our 14th in a row on Thursday against Winnipeg, LeBron or at least LeBron's marketing rep who posts some of his tweets will tweet: 'Wow. 14 in a row Pengins. Congrats,'" said Pittsburgh head coach Dan Bylsma. "I told the guys and they're obviously thrilled. I just hope they can keep their attention on the ice and don't think ahead to LeBron's tweet."
Pittsburgh general manager Ray Shero has known for days that a LeBron tweet about the Penguins was in the works if the team could keep winning and has been actively making trades to improve his team in hopes of earning that recognition.
"It was the talk of hockey a few weeks ago when LeBron mentioned Chicago's points streak on Twitter, which in turn got the Blackhawks noticed by national media," said Shero. "We made it our goal that day as an organization to get noticed by him."
If Pittsburgh can increase its win streak to 14 games, team owner Mario Lemieux has said he will have the tweet placed on a banner, which will be raised to the Consol Energy Center rafters alongside the team's three Stanley Cup championship banners.
I pity the hockey team that has Mr. T on it.