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It appears the honeymoon is over for Chan Gailey and the Buffalo Bills. Just days after Gailey’s hiring, players on the team are already tuning him out, with one veteran reporting that “he has totally lost the team.”

While ownership has yet to comment on the Gailey situation, it appears that his days as Buffalo Bills coach could be numbered.

“Chan has totally lost this team,” said one player, who asked not to be identified. “People just aren’t buying into anything he’s saying. Yes, he just started and he hasn’t really done any coaching and he hasn’t even met most of the players, but there’s a feeling among the team that his message is getting a little stale. This is the fastest I’ve ever seen it happen, except when Cam Cameron was tuned out by the Dolphins before he was even hired.”

One piece of evidence that the Bills have turned on Gailey is the fact that none of the team’s veterans have returned the new coach’s phone calls.

“He’s tried to reach out to some of the veteran guys who have been here a long time and he hasn’t had any luck,” the player said. “It’s not that they don’t respect him or anything. It’s just that they don’t really believe in what he’s trying to do. Or, in the case of Trent Edwards, they’ve never heard of him and thought he was a telemarketer.”

One player who would go on record was wide receiver Terrell Owens. Owens said he didn’t feel Gailey was able to relate to his players and criticized him for refusing to listen to his players’ input.

“Some guys just don't have the ability to communicate well with players and I think that’s what’s happening with Chan,” Owens said on the Dan Patrick radio show. “Plus, he won’t listen to any suggestions. I left him a voice mail saying ‘Get me the ball, motherf—ker!’ and he never even returned my call. It was Dick Jauron's number, but I assume he's living in the same place. So I’m tuning him out. Usually it’s the coach tuning me out, so I’m turning the tables here.”

New Bills GM Buddy Nix is standing by his head coach, insisting that it’s way too early to judge him on his job performance. He also doesn’t believe he’s losing his players.

“I think that’s bunk. I really do,” Nix said yesterday. “Chan has been our coach for three days and people are already saying he’s lost the team? He hasn’t even had a training camp yet. He’s still moving into his office. In my experience, it usually takes at least one season for a coach to truly lose his players, which would work out fine for us, because about the amount of time we need to convince Bill Cowher to come here.”

Hey, did you hear that New York Jets head coach Rex Ryan is a bit overweight? The New York Post claims he ingests 7,000 calories a day of "Rexican" food.

So, yeah … he may be on the chubby side. Here are the pictures to prove it.

Rex successfully hid his disappointment that it wasn't one of those chip-and-dip helmets.

Mrs. Ryan likes to carry these around at all times because her husband is quite flatulent.

Cold showers make it even harder for Rex to find his penis.

Ten minutes later, John Madden found a very unpleasant gift in his toilet.

When it comes to onion ring towers, Rex demands that they be at least this high.

Media members are no longer allowed to bring food to Jets press conferences because Ryan is easily distracted.

Peanuts and Cracker Jacks simply don't get Rex sh!t-faced.

Rex was happy he was able to talk him out cremation and into being deep-fried and devoured as an hors d'oeuvre upon death.

Sometimes an adult steer takes a while to digest.

Rex Ryan loves every kind of chocolate.

Rex's flavor-savor was not for the ladies, but for hearty stews and casseroles.

Most team logos represent nothing more than a team's name and colors. But the San Diego Chargers logo means so much more.

Of course, we all know what the San Diego Chargers logo looks like.

Here it is. It looks like a lightning bolt. But scroll down to discover why it is so much more than that.

WINNERS

1. Foreign kickers — Neil Rackers, Shaun Shuisham, Nate Kaeding. All failures. And all of them sound pretty 'Mer'can. For NFL kickers to become helpful to their team again, we need to go back to foreign kickers like in the old days. We need these guys:

2. Brett Favre — Congrats on the win. But your biggest accomplishment this weekend was re-inforcing your brand as a total a—hole by running up the score on the Cowboys. The next step? Wrangler Window-Pane Jeans! The clear plastic in the seat let's people actually see your a—hole!

3. other sports — What a crap weekend of football games. The first three games were blowouts, and the last one was just bad football. I'm sure I'm not the only one who kept switching over to the men's figure skating championships, am I right? If the Jets really want respect, they'll dress like swans.

4. Kim Kardashian — Hey! Looks like your boyfriend might not be a massive bust after all. Yay! Just a regular bust. (Like yours. It's your ass that's huge.) Anyway, if he can stay in the news a few more years, it can only help your career which is … I don't know. But I'm sure you're very talented at it. And to make that happen, you need to help Reggie succeed. For example, it's going to be hard for him to run this week against Minnesota's line without some help. Have you considered asking your sister Khloe to play left tackle?

5. NORV! — ZORN! didn't even last two weeks past its namesake's dismissal. It's not that ZORN! failed. It's just that something better (or worse, depending on how you look at it) came along … something that has been there all along. And here's the good news: the Chargers just extended Norv Turner's contract through 2013. No, seriously. That means NORV! isn't going anywhere for a long time. Just like the Chargers in the playoffs. NORV!

LOSERS

1. Wade Phillips — You lost, but you are keeping your job. That's a wash. But what bumps you into the Loser category is that we all know how it ends for you in Dallas. We've seen this movie before. One more postseason exit and Jerry Jones is going to tie Jason Garrett to a tree, and then make you strip down.

2. Curtis Painter — Had the Jets met everyone's expectations and made a quick exit from the playoffs, your Week 16 sucktastrophe would have slid further into our collective memory. But no, they had to advance all the way to the AFC Championship Game to play the Colts … again. Now everyone will be talking about Week 16 again and how awful you were/are. Worse: not only do the Jets have tape on Peyton Manning from the first half, but if they get nervous before the game and need to relax, they can flip on your performance and laugh away those butterflies. You're doomed, Painter.

3. America — Kurt Warner, Derrick Mason and Ed Reed all plan to go Brett Favre on us this offseason with a tortured decision on possible retirement. Oh, joy. Yippy. Every player now wants to see what his funeral would be like. They want to basically fake their death, hear everyone say how great they are … and then come back. The only problem is that all the media coverage makes me want to actually kill myself.

4. San Diego Police — Forget the possible abuse of power seen in this video from Sunday.

You're a police officer in San Diego and you can't manage to stay in shape? Did it rain that one day last year you were planning to exercise, officer?

5. Jets fans — They took their Massive Stereotype Tour on the road again this week, this time all the way to San Diego, where I'm sure they saw that a large segment of the population dresses JUST LIKE THAT! However, in their defense, these fans have been consistent over the years. For example, last year when Brett Favre was the Jets quarterback, many Jets fans dressed up as white trash.

Google, Inc. has purchased the website FireNorv.net for $1 billion, a deal that gives the internet giant control of the most-trafficked and most-established "Fire Coach" website in the world.

"Since 1994 when the Internet was first coming into broad use in homes, FireNorv.net was already there thanks to Norv Turner's 3-13 season with the Washington Redskins," read Google's statement announcing the deal. "Through the dotcom bubble and beyond, the FireNorv.net's growth has continued thanks to Norv Turner's continued failure in Washington, Oakland and San Diego. We are excited to lead this growth into the new decade and beyond."

Most industry analysts say Google got a huge bargain in the deal considering Turner's now three-decade stranglehold on coaching ineptitude at the professional level. But FireNorv.net's owner says he was happy with the $1 billion figure.

"It's never been about the money," he said. "It's always been about making sure Norv Turner never gets to coach another team. I can't believe we've been around for 16 years. When we were just a start-up, most said we wouldn't last more than a year tops. Norv was that bad."

And he still is. Yet the coach keeps getting opportunities, which is why Google doesn't see risk in making the deal now, when Turner could get fired by the Chargers.

"If the Chargers let him go, he'll probably get hired by the Bills," said industry analyst Jeremy Rogers. "FireNorv.net's business model is built as much on Norv Turner being a moron as it is on NFL general managers being morons. It's very sound."

Google will immediately plug FireNorv.net into its keyword engine, bringing the site traffic when anyone searches for keywords such as "failure", "loss", "unmitigated f—king disaster", "Hindenburg", and "Is Norv really his name?".

Analysts expect Google to earn back its purchase price in the first year, especially if Turner makes another playoff performance.

US Weekly is reporting today that the boyfriend of international celebrity Kim Kardashian has become jealous of his beautiful girlfriend's fame and is trying to earn attention for himself.

"You see this all the time in relationships in which one person is a talented celebrity and the other is just a regular person," says star watcher Sheila Kemp. "It's why these relationships rarely last. Kim needs someone who understands the pressures of fame."

Kardashian's boyfriend, Reginald Alfred "Reggie" Bush, is a seldom used player for a foot-ball team in Louisiana. In his team's recent game, which was broadcast on television, the diminutive Bush scored many points.

Star expert Rhonda Shandor says Bush's display was sad and desperate.

"You can't blame him for feeling overshadowed by Kim, who is as big a star, as big a talent as we have," said Shandor. "But it really showed the difference between the two and why this guy she's with will never be a star. Everything Kim does is effortless, whereas he was covered in sweat. On television! Kim has a new perfume out. Being with this guy hurts her brand."

And that wasn't the worst of it.

"Who did his wardrobe?" asked Shandor. "I know Kim would never let him go out in those horrid, gold tights with the stripes. He is getting bad advice. She needs to rein him in or end the relationship. Now."

According to sources close to Kardashian, she wants to stay with her boyfriend, but is insisting on complete control of his career.

"First, she's working a deal where he wins that big game they have, the Super Game," said the source. "That will get her some camera time and hopefully get him off this sports kick. And then she wants to dress him up nicely and take him to awards shows and photo shoots and benefits. Her plan is to follow the model Gisele took with her boyfriend. Gisele's guy has almost completely forgotten about his sports career and is instead content to be her accessory. That's the way to do it. And it's Kim's goal for 2010."

Saturday

4:30 p.m. ET

Arizona at New Orleans (-7)

The Saints are asking all their fans to dress in black. And don't forget New Orleans' history with Voodoo and the dark arts. And then consider they have to play Kurt Warner. All of this is why Pat Robertson is picking the Cardinals to win 175 to death-by-locusts.

My pick: Arizona (and to win)

8:00 p.m. ET

Baltimore at Indianapolis (-6.5)

This is a big game. Yes, it's the playoffs. But more because we'll have a definite answer on whether it's right or not to rest your starters for the playoffs. So that will be decided and then the sports media will get to spend it's time on bigger issues. Like their shock and outrage over baseball players who used steroids. Or their shock and outrage over college coaches taking better jobs. Our their shock and outrage over whatever story breaks next.

My pick: Indianapolis

Sunday

1:00 p.m. ET

Dallas at Minnesota (-2.5)

If you like watching quarterbacks play like kids out there, this is the game for you.

Ha! That was a setup, pervert! Watch this game and you'll get a knock on the door from Chris Hanson.

My pick: Dallas (and to win)

New York Jets at San Diego (-7)

The Jets are way overmatched in this game. And then there is this stat — and recall that stats mean everything: Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez hasn't won a game in Southern California in more than a year. This guy just can't win when he's not playing in cold weather.

My pick: San Diego***

Indianapolis has done it again. Twenty-six years after the Colts left town, Baltimore is losing the Ravens to Indianapolis, too. Win or lose against the Colts in their divisional round playoff game, the Ravens plan to say in Indiana and never return.

"This was the carrot we dangled to them before the Patriots game," said Ravens head coach John Harbaugh. "Beat New England and you'll never have to live or work in Baltimore again. I think we all saw how motivated the players were to make that dream a reality."

The Ravens say they would have moved to greener pastures immediately after the Patriots game, but they had to return to Baltimore to pack up their belongings.

"I have $24,000 worth of audio and video equipment in my condo that I use to watch TV, primarily episodes of 'The Wire'," said tight end Todd Heap. "I felt it was the best way to appreciate my time in Baltimore."

Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti, a Baltimore native, says he is excited about the move.

"I grew up watching the Colts, and then I saw them leave for bigger opportunities," he said. "That's the dream of every young kid in Baltimore. Have success so you can move out of here. We're ready to take that step."

Bisciotti says he isn't worried about being the second NFL team in Indianapolis —"It's better than being surrounded by the Eagles, Redskins and Steelers markets," he said — and understands many Baltimore residents will be upset by the move.

"This can't be happening," said Tammy Hafer, a Baltimore plumber and member of the Ravens band. "This is twice now we've had our team taken right out from under us. We would never do this to anyone else."

Baltimore city officials are reportedly already close to a deal to bring the Jacksonville Jaguars to Baltimore beginning with the 2011 season.