May 23, 2012

Picture Mark Teixeira is Terrified of the Baseball

You should see how scared he looks when he's batting.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
Filed Under   MLB   new york yankees   Mark Teixeira
May 11, 2012

Picture Yankees Scoreboard Trivia is Very Specific

Two bucks. That's too much for a 13-inch TV in Tennessee.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
April 20, 2012

Picture Players are Apparently Chucking Bats Over the Right Field Wall

They have powerful swings, yet incredibly weak grips.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
Filed Under   MLB   new york yankees
April 18, 2012

Picture Even Yankees Banner Ads are Obnoxious

It's not just a banner ad, it's a YANKEES banner ad.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
Filed Under   MLB   new york yankees
April 17, 2012

Picture Feel Free to Murder Pregnant Red Sox Fans on the NYC Subway

We all benefit if Red Sox fans don't reproduce.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
Filed Under   MLB   Boston Red Sox   new york yankees

Poll Which big-budget MLB team that is off to a bad start has the least cause for concern?

1600 votes / / 0 comments / View Poll »
From Greg Bright / March 20, 2012

News Derek Jeter Still Undecided on Which Supermodel to Pick Up for 2012 Season

undefined - Image 1
With the regular season quickly approaching, Yankee executives are quietly becoming concerned about team captain Derek Jeter's inability to decide which unbelievably hot woman he is going to date for the 2012 season.

"We've heard that there are plenty of options available, including at least three South American supermodels, two actresses, and four porn stars, but Derek hasn't finalized anything yet," Yankee general manager Brian Cashman said. "It's a concern. You hope to have these things out of the way by now so he can focus on baseball. Plus, it doesn't only affect him. What is the YES Network going to do if they can't cut to some hot chick every time Derek comes up to bat?"

The pressure on Jeter to finalize a girlfriend takes on extra importance in light of Alex Rodriguez dating former WWE diva Torrie Wilson, meaning if nothing changes, YES would be forced to decide between shots of a muscular woman in her late 30s or no player girlfriends at all.

"It's okay for one of them to start the season without a hot girlfriend but for both of them to not be dating anyone worthy of gossiping about? That's just disrespecting the whole organization, I'm ashamed to be their teammates at this point," Yankees right fielder Nick Swisher said. "I really hope they step up and do the right thing."

The blogosphere did briefly heat up last month with news that Yankee outfielder Brett Gardner had begun dating a supporting actress from several Broadway musicals but when this was brought up to Yankee co-owner Hank Steinbrenner, he laughed saying that he'd rather "put the camera on a drunken hobo pissing in the alley."

/ 0 comments / Keep Reading »
Filed Under   MLB   new york yankees   derek jeter
March 01, 2012

Picture Hipster Babe Ruth

He hit home runs before everyone started doing it.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
Filed Under   MLB   new york yankees   Babe Ruth
February 27, 2012

Picture This Sports Fan Has No Friends

He also likes the Patriots and Red Wings and Duke basketball and Alabama football.

/ 0 comments / View Picture »
February 27, 2012

News "Moneyball" Loses Best Picture to Big-Budget Yankees Highlights DVD

undefined - Image 1
"Moneyball," the story of Oakland A's general manager Billy Beane building his low-budget franchise through exploiting market inefficiencies, has made $75 million so far on a relatively paltry $50 million budget. The film also was nominated for several Academy Awards, including Best Picture. However, despite all of the accomplishments, "Moneyball" still could not wrest the Best Picture Oscar away from "Yankees 2011" — the New York Yankees highlights DVD with a behemoth $200 million budget.

"I am proud of what we accomplished with this movie," said Brad Pitt. "But sometimes it doesn't matter how smart you are or how much you try, a big budget film just destroys everything else."

"Yankees 2011" was directed by James Cameron — his first film since 2009's "Avatar."

"Could the story have been better? Less contrived? Sure," said Cameron. "Was the writing obvious and cliched? No doubt. But the special effects were amazing. Between all of the effects and the marketing that was put behind it, I am convinced that by the end of 'Yankees 2011', the audience actually believed the 2011 Yankees were a great team. Now that's impressive storytelling."

Academy Award voters insist that they are not affected by a movie studio's Oscar push P.R., but it would be hard to remember "Moneyball" in light of the promotional blitz put on for "Yankees 2011." From the Yankees, voters received a baseball signed by everyone on the team, a personal visit from Derek Jeter, free season tickets to every home game at Yankee Stadium and $50,000 cash. From "Moneyball" producers, voters received an e-mail from former A's first baseman Scott Hatteberg.

/ 0 comments / Keep Reading »
Filed Under   MLB   new york yankees   Oakland A's