Hipsters love Harvard basketball players.
"I'm out of a job," confirmed Jeff Sierman, who ran the Post's 32-person Jeremy Lin pun staff. "I thought the Knicks would keep Jeremy forever and that I would have as much job security as you can in this business. But, suddenly, I'm jobless and desperate for linterviews."
The New York Daily News also is reportedly about to get rid of it's 14-person Jeremy Lin pun staff.
"I wish the Knicks realized there are a lot of jobs on the line here," said Daily News Chief Lin Pun and Wordplay Editor Michael Ranuado. "And for the record, when I said 'line' there, I mean for the L-I-N part to be accentuated."
Maybe one day you can get rich and famous and look like an idiot.
"I think it really shows the effort I put into defense," said Stoudemire. "I've been in the league 10 years, but this is the first time I've been named to one of the all-defensive teams. I'm glad my defense is finally being noted in a positive way."
Stoudemire and Anthony are joined on the All-Defensive 28th Team by Steve Nash, Hedo Turkoglu and J.J. Redick. The 29th and 30th Teams are made up entirely of Sacramento Kings and Charlotte Bobcats players.
Anthony who, like Stoudemire was named to an All-Defensive team for the first time in his career, says defense is obviously not the Knicks' problem.
"If you average Tyson's Defensive Player of the Year in with me an Amare getting 28th team, we're like top 20 in the league in defense," said Anthony. "You can win with top 20 defense. We just need to score more. I will take that responsibility on me next year by shooting more, even if that means my defense has to suffer a little bit."
News Confident Carmelo Anthony guarantees "Not one, not two, but three" Knicks playoff wins next year
"We're only going to get better," said Anthony. "If we can get me and Amar'e and Tyson Chandler and Jeremy Lin all healthy and playing together through a full training camp and NBA season, as well as maybe adding a few new pieces? I could see us getting all the way to a first round Game 7, I really can."
Anthony says his playoff track record gives him the wisdom to make such a prediction.
"I've been to the playoffs nine times in my career and once made it to the promised land of the second round," he said. "I want to take the Knicks there one day. Maybe not next year, maybe not the year after that. But I can guarantee that the Madison Square Garden rafters will rain confetti and streamers two to possibly three times next year in the playoffs for first round wins, provided we are given a playoff opponent we match up well with, preferably a team who is without several of their top players due to injury."
In every joke, there's 100-percent of truth (if it's about the Knicks).
Tape won't stop an Amare attack.
1949: Ben Hogan slams his car into the front of a Greyhound bus in a misguided attempt to make golf seem exciting.
1985: Joe Theismann lines up behind center in complete disregard of the fact that Lawrence Taylor still plays football.
1988: Greg Oden is born.
1989-2010: Ken Griffey, Jr. plays baseball. (At least one of those several dozen trips to the DL had to have been his fault.)
1998: Cal Ripken, Jr. watches an evening of CBS' primetime lineup, instantly making himself an old person and effectively ending his consecutive games streak.
2001: Bill GramÃ¡tica tears his ACL while celebrating a successful field goal, setting off a chain-reaction in which millions of Americans injured abdominal muscles while laughing.
He's the Jerome Lane of fire extinguishers.