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SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010.

Today: TorontoBlue Jays (2009: 75-87, 4th in AL East)

Good ole' Glen from accounting, who was slated to retire at the end of the month, announced today that he will sign a one-day contract with the Yankees and retire as a New York Yankee.

Glen has worked in those cubicles over by the men's bathroom for the past 17 years, but he says he has always thought of himself as a Yankee after having an accounting internship with the team in 1971 while he was in college.

"My accounting career has taken me many different places," says Glen. "Hepfer's Waste Management for 12 years, the start-up I joined in the '80s that was going to build flying cars, serving as volunteer treasurer of my son's Little League, and here to this company for the past 17 years. But I always wanted to get back to where it started: in the Bronx as a New York Yankee."

Yankees president Randy Levine says the organization has no record of Glen working for the team "because we didn't keep paperwork on unpaid college interns in the '70s," but will still allow him to retire as a Yankee.

"I don't know why we didn't think of this earlier," said Levine. "We charge a fee — Glen is paying $1,500 — and let someone say they are a Yankee for 24 hours, well … only eight working hours, contractually. And then they're gone. Easy money. We do this for a couple weeks and we'll have enough money to install platinum toilet seats in the luxury box bathrooms."

Glen says he is especially happy about the retirement package the Yankees will give him.

"They're class all the way," he said. "I get a certificate that says 'Congrats, BLANK, on retiring a Yankee.' And also 10-percent off any one box seat ticket to a game against the Orioles and a signed baseball card from Alfredo Aceves."

SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010.

Today: Oakland A's (2009: 75-87, last in AL West)

Just a day before his scheduled spring training debut, sweat-covered Pirates rookie pitcher Brad Lincoln has announced that he forgets if he uses his right hand or left hand to pitch.

"Dammit, which one is it?" Lincoln said to the press, amidst moments of deep thinking and pretending to throw with both arms.

Lincoln began experiencing problems during a fielding drill where he could not find his glove, which, according to Lincoln, would have been a good indicator of which hand he uses to throw. The problem was only exacerbated by the lack of film room or Internet access in the Pirates' Bradenton training facility.

Despite concerns, Lincoln expressed confidence that he would remember his throwing arm within a timetable of four to six hours he had set for himself, claiming that if he thought about other things, it would probably come to him.

Three days later, Lincoln still finds himself unsure.

Since the initial incident, Lincoln has attempted several different methods of recollection. While in the bathroom this morning, Lincoln reportedly searched his arms for the scar left behind by his 2007 Tommy John surgery, but he claimed there were too many spots on his arm and his shoulder he "couldn't really see." Several teammates confirmed that Lincoln tried on their gloves but complained that a glove on either hand felt fine, and neither was as "uncomfortable" or "weird-feeling" as he hoped. Lincoln even toyed with the idea that he's been ambidextrous the whole time but quickly rejected that notion.

"It's not a good situation," said Pirates manager John Russell. "But it's the kind of thing a lot of young pitchers go through. He's just going to get through it on his own."

According to Lincoln, reciting the Pledge of Allegiance helped him to remember which is his right hand, but it did not help him as far as his pitching arm conundrum.

SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010.

Today:Houston Astros (2009: 74-88, 5th in NL Central)

SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010.

Today:New York Mets (2009: 70-92, 4th in NL East)

SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010.

Today:Arizona Diamondbacks (2009: 70-92, last in NL West)

SportsPickle is previewing each MLB team in the lead up to Opening Day 2010.

Today:Cleveland Indians (2009: 65-97, T-last in AL Central)