September 20, 2011

Picture Guy's Obituary Expresses Dislike for Joe Mauer

My obituary will list all of my fantasy sports titles.

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Filed Under   MLB   Brett Favre   Minnesota Twins   Joe Mauer
August 17, 2011

Picture Maine and Rhode Island Hate Jim Thome

Those elitist New Englanders think "country strong" is cheating.

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   Jim Thome
by DJ Gallo / August 16, 2011

News Boring Jim Thome Hits 600 Home Runs Without the Attention of Any Steroid Scandals

Minnesota Twins slugger Jim Thome has become just the eighth player in baseball history to hit 600 home runs. Yet many Americans don’t know his name and wouldn’t recognize his face, as his Q-rating was never boosted by a headlines-grabbing steroid scandal.

“If I had to do it all over again – sure, I’d probably at least try to have my name linked to BALCO or that Galea guy,” said Thome. “It’s really the only way to get attention in modern baseball. But back when I was young, I didn’t have the wisdom to know to surround my accomplishments with question marks.”

Thome’s push for 600 home runs received little fanfare — same as with his 500th home run in 2007 — but he soldiered on.

“I remember how much attention Bonds and McGwire and Sosa and Manny Ramirez got for their career milestones, while I’m pretty much ignored,” said the 21-year veteran. “It’s frustrating. I even had my wife draw some bacne on me in red pen last week in hopes it would catch the attention of reporters, but no one noticed.”

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   Jim Thome
July 20, 2011

Picture Twins Fan Forced to Resort to Dick

They're very open with prostitution in the Upper Midwest.

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins
June 27, 2011

Picture The Joe Mauer Backhair Jersey

I don't think that's officially licensed by MLB.

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   Joe Mauer
June 16, 2011

Video The Twins are Even Worse at Acting Than They are at Baseball

Joe Mauer got hurt during the first take.

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   Jason Kubel   Scott Baker
May 03, 2011

Video Carl Pavano Beats Bench to Death

It was like this every day when he was on the Yankees.

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   Carl Pavano
April 07, 2011

Video Justin Morneau is an All-Star at Handshakes

He's friendlier than other players because he's Canadian. (via GLBLWRMER)

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   Justin Morneau
January 06, 2011

Video Bert Blyleven Will Not Go Into the Hall of Fame of Live Television

No Hall of Famer has cursed like this since Ty Cobb.

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Filed Under   MLB   media   Minnesota Twins   Bert Blyleven
October 08, 2010

Picture Does the Minnesota Twins' Bear Mascot Sh*t in the Woods?

Yes. Apparently.

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Filed Under   MLB   Minnesota Twins   mascots