"I'm telling you, I don't like these people," Barkley said during an interview on a Dallas sports talk radio station. "And some of the female ones are hot. Real hot. The kind of women I'd normally have sex with in a bar bathroom or nail out behind an Applebee's against a dumpster. But I don't know anymore."
Barkley infamously got arrested for a DUI in late 2008 while racing to get oral sex from a woman he had met an a Scottsdale, Ariz., bar, but he said today that if that incident occurred with a Heat fan, he could never forgive himself.
"That would be a personal low," said Barkley. "I can just see the headline: 'Charles Barkley Gets a DUI Going to Have Sex with a Heat Fan.' It could be the end of my career. I have never believed I'm a role model, but I also don't want kids thinking it's not shameful to have sex with these people."
"And a follow up: 'Will you now give me a wedgie?'"
Picture Chris Bosh's Alley Oop Signal
Of course, because it is Bosh's, it's weird.
Picture Miami Heat Fan is Icy
Icy means douchey, right?
I don't think he looks bald at all.
"You don't have success in this business by making rash decisions," said Riley. "Yes, there was an urge to let Erik go back in late November when we were 9-8, but I felt that now was the better time to make the move."
Spoelstra loses his job after helping the Heat run through the Eastern Conference playoffs with a 12-3 record. But it wasn't enough for Riley.
"He said something about how we could have been undefeated and that perfection is the goal," said Spoelstra. "But I think he was mainly just trying to cover his ass for a wrongful termination lawsuit. Everyone knows how much he wants another NBA title on his coaching resume. I've assumed this was coming ever since he moved into my office during our 12-game winning streak during the regular season. I am very proud of what I've done with this team, considering that I've been watching film and meeting with players in a small equipment closet near the arena service elevator since January."
I bet America put him up to it.
He probably does this on orders from Charles Barkley.
In the old days he would have followed that up by throwing them through windows.