The lead truck's driver was given a note to hand to Baltimore's mayor:
"Dear Baltimore You can have the Colts back. Sorry about taking them before. Please do not return them. All the best! Sincerely, Mayor Gregory Ballard and the People of Indianapolis."
Baltimore's mayor read the note with a blank expression.
"I don't know what to think," said Baltimore mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake. "A lot of people still wish the Colts were here, so they'll be happy about this. But we have the Ravens now. This city isn't big enough to support two NFL teams."
Indianapolis Mayor Ballard said that should not be an issue: "The Colts are not currently an NFL-quality team. But Indianapolis hopes to get an NFL team again someday."
"There are a lot of things that can be a distraction to a modern athlete's neck," said Dungy, who has written self-help books and mentored Michael Vick, Plaxico Burress and others since stepping away from coaching. "But I find that if a neck just stays looking ahead at the Lord, it doesn't need to twist or turn, so it will never get hurt. Jesus saves necks."
Manning underwent offseason neck surgery on May 23rd, but his rehab and arm strength have plateaued and it is expected that he will miss the Colts' season opener, if not more games, and end his consecutive starts streak at 208.
"It's been frustrating, obviously," said Manning. "But I do feel like I'm getting closer to being 100-percent again. I just need rehab and rest. Unfortunately, it's been tough to do either the last few days with Tony always appearing out of nowhere to try to talk to my neck or pray for my neck. He was a pretty good coach, I guess, but he's super weird."
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell announced the rule change today after being summoned to meet with Peyton Manning and his father, Archie, at the family's New Orleans home.
"It is my job to look out for the best interests of the NFL," said Goodell, "and it occurred to me today, while being served tea by Archie Manning while, I have to admit, quite fearful that he was going to pour the hot kettle on my lap, that no hitting or touching of quarterback necks should be allowed."
In addition to the no hitting or touching of quarterback necks, defensive players will be subject to ejection if they force a quarterback to move or twist his neck.
"Essentially, if anyone plays too tight of defensive on Peyton's primary receiver, forcing him to turn his neck and look for someone else to throw to, that player will be ejected," said Archie Manning. "I've been pushing for this rule for my boys for years, even before Peyton hurt his neck."
I fear Eli Manning thinks this is real.
This is what a drunken night in Baltimore leaves you with. Also: the clap. (via KSK)
Opinion A Very Manning Family Christmas
Gee, thanks for my Sponge Bob knapsack, Santa!
Okay, kid gift time is over. What did you get me?
(Peyton and Eli pick up a big box from under the tree and place it at their father's feet.)
Wow! It's huge!
I chipped in for the paper and the bow.
Who are you again?
Cooper. Your oldest.
My oldest what? Failure?
Shut up, failure.
(Archie excitedly tears into the package and opens up the top of box. He pulls out a sweater.)
What the? What is this? A fking sweater?
Yeah, dad. We thought it would look good on you. You know, for TV. I got it at the best men's clothier in all of Indianapolis!
Indianapo-? let me tell you little turds something. I don't even like football, okay? I played it for you. I went to college for you. I toiled for years for that piece of crap Saints franchise for you. I learned all about the game for you. So one day I could raise two sons, teach them everything about the game, and they could go on to become the two highest-paid players in the NFL. Why? So they would be super rich and I could get some kickass Christmas gifts.
Umm three sons, dad.
Shut up, Cooper. Your ashamed father is talking.
"Peyton Manning has been the coach here for 13 years," said one source inside the organization. "I'm starting to get the sense some of the players are tuning him out. Especially Peyton Manning."
A tense relationship between former Vikings head coach Brad Childress and Brett Favre helped doom Minnesota's season earlier this year, and the same may be happening in Indianapolis where Manning has thrown 11 interceptions in his past three games, all Colt losses.
One Colts receiver, who wished to remain anonymous, said Manning is giving Peyton bad plays.
Oh, come on. Don't pretend you don't know what you just did. It was an abomination. And if you truly don't know what you just did or think what you did was okay, well then your moral code is more wicked than Tony Dungy imagined.
So that makes you either a sinner or truly evil. Either way, you're going to have to start living the right way or risk the continued scorn of Tony Dungy.