Picture Clay Matthews, Jr. Kindergarten Photo
No wonder he learned to be tough. The beatings must have been exhausting.
Video A.J. Hawk Pushes Man Into a Lake
This is the potential the Packers saw when they drafted him.
Video World's Worst Woman Steals Shoes from Kid
Her life's dream is to receive a dick-pic text from Brett Favre.
Video Drunk, Sobbing Packers Fan is the Highlight of the NFL Playoffs
The Packers lost because they can't tackle and because of the lack of sparkles.
News Packers Stock Plummets to All-Time Low of $0.46 a Share
Packers stock had recently been selling for as much as $250 a share as investors were flocking to get in on the 15-1 Super Bowl favorite with the high-powered offense, but now shares can be had for 46 cents — a development that has rocked the Green Bay Stock Exchange (GBSE).
"This is a huge blow to the Green Bay economy," said Wisconsin stock analyst Roger Jurgensen. "Not only will the Packers' defeat steal an additional week of bar, hotel and restaurant traffic from the town, as well as merchandise sales, but the repercussions are being felt throughout the market, too. You have to realize that Packers stock is all that's traded on the GBSE floor other than cheese futures."
It is hoped that cheese investors will stabilize the Green Bay market while Packers stock bottoms out.
"People here eat a ton of extremely unhealthy, cheese-covered foods," said Dale Lundqvist, considered the Warren Buffett of local dairy investing. "And people like to eat even more unhealthy, cheese-covered foods when they're depressed. The Packers depressed the hell out of people," he added, squeezing a tube of nacho cheese into his mouth and continuing on talking unintelligibly.
Picture Packers Fans Under the Impression It's Cold in Green Bay
If they get severe frostbite, everyone will just assume it's part of the costume.
