"It is my solemn vow that for each day the NFL owners unjustly prevent us from doing our jobs and making a living to support our families," said Bryant, "one incredibly embarrassing story about me will come out. Only NFL owners, along with enhanced mall security, can put a stop to this."
Bryant says he sees himself "a modern day, douchier, Gandhi."
"I took a history class at Oklahoma State," he said. "I forget all the details, but I think Gandhi dressed in a robe and wore funny glasses until the king would stop taking his food or something. I don't remember exactly. Although I do remember I got an A in the class. Good school, Oklahoma State."
The second-year receiver says he has many embarrassing activities already planned.
"Tomorrow I'm going to get in a fight at the mall arcade when they tell me I don't have enough tickets to get a stuffed panda bear at the prize counter," he said. "And the next day I'm going to crash my Big Wheel into a police cruiser. The next day? Let me just say that it involves a turd and the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese."