Video Bear Beats Monkey in Bicycle Race by Eating It
At least the bear didn't blood dope. That would really taint cycling.
Video When Riding Your Motorcycle, Don't Crash Into a Bicycle Race
Take THAT, Lance Armstrong.
Video Cycling Becomes Entertaining with Hilarious Crashes
What idiot put a road sign on road?
Video Lance Armstrong Sings Radiohead (Sort Of)
Imagine how strong and virile Thom Yorke would be with some roids.
Picture The Biggest Cheater in Cycling History
Lance Armstrong never flew. Aliens are a performance enhancer.
News Lance Armstrong Sues Lance Armstrong for Saying Lance Armstrong Did Steroids
"It is one big lie," said Armstrong. "I never failed a test. Not a single test. I am going to take Lance Armstrong for everything he has for spreading these lies about me."
Armstrong's lead attorney, Tim Herman, said: "I'm confused. But per Lance's orders, I will proceed quickly and fiercely with this lawsuit. Unless, you know, Lance Armstrong tells me to stop. The other one. Again. I'm confused."
Others close to the cyclist wonder if nearly 15 years of heavy and non-stop drug use has left Armstrong with cognitive issues or even dementia, as it's not possible to sue one's self.
Armstrong said he is of sound mind.
"You know who isn't going to be of sound mind? Lance Armstrong when he finds out I'm coming after him for spouting filth about me."
Opinion Comprehensive List of 1990s Sports Figures Not Tainted by Steroids or Scandal
Note: Refresh frequently as names will be dropped as new allegations and scandals emerge.
1. Michael Jordan*
2. Pete Sampras
3. Kerri Strug
4. Jeff Gordon's car
5. Aaron Sele
6. Willie Mays Hayes
7. Zubaz pants
8. NHL '94
9. maybe a bowler
10. Jaromir Jagr's mullet
11. Baseball commissioner Fay Vincent
12. Don Shula
13. LPGA?
14. Vin Scully
15. Rik Smits
16. Morten Andersen
- – - – -
* Probably did steroids. He was too competitive not to.
Picture Lance Armstrong Saga Takes a Wild Rug-Based Turn
You go hardwood or it's cheating.
