I bet chicks want to sleep with him. They have in the past, at least.
This might be why he's not in the Hall of Fame.
Alfonso Soriano ruined the Cubs and this man's ability to procreate.
Like most Cubs, his best talent is something other than baseball.
I still regret the astronaut back tattoo I got when I was 5.
Picture The Cubs Fail at Everything
It will take them more than 100 years to fix that.
The greatest Italian batter since Joe DiMaggio.
Spilling beer at Wrigley is far worse than anything Bartman did.
A century-plus of failure has finally defeated their self-respect.
It's almost like Wrigley Field wasn't designed for football. (via Sports By Brooks)