Thanks for having me in for an interview, Mr. Jordan. It's an honor.
You're welcome. But, look, I'll be honest here: I've never heard of you and I don't even know your name. I just had my secretary pick an NBA assistant's name out of a hat for an interview and she pulled your name.
Okay. Well, I hope to make the best of this opportunity. And my name is Mike, by the way, same as you!
Bullshit. No one is like me. I'm the best there ever was. I will call you Phil, Doug, Larry, Paul or Dean those are the first names of the only coaches I've ever heard of.
That's right, okay, Larry. Say your name is Larry.
My name is Larry.
I thought so. Now listen up, Phil, do you know how to break down tape?
Definitely. It's my speciality.
Good. Then I want you to take a look at this.
He knows more about hockey than running a basketball team.
Opinion Flowchart: Are You a Moron?
Kentucky: The Turrble State.
Opinion Honest NBA DNPs
That Michael Jordan really knows how to build a team.
He's only an 11-year veteran. He'll learn free throws eventually.
Sex scandal or gambling? I'm betting on gambling.
Picture Miami Heat Coming Out Party
It's a brave decision. They all need our support.