Video Bobcats Go 0-for-5 on Final Possession to Lose to Lakers
Maybe it was 0-for-4. No shame there.
News Report: Michael Jordan Out $12.6 Million in Gambling Losses Thanks to Charlotte Bobcats' Surprising 7-7 Start
"Michael is really pissed off," said a Bobcats front office source. "Something really bad has to happen for him to show up at the office because he takes a I'll say a 'hands-off' approach to management. But he's been here all week demanding answers about why this team is winning games."
Jordan came to the team's office for the first time all season last week after the Bobcats went on a tear in which they won five of six to get to 6-4 a streak that saw their owner lose nearly $10 million and put off the purchase of a Ferrari. Since an office tirade and a closed-door meeting with this team, the Bobcats have lost three of four including a 45-point loss to Oklahoma City in which they trailed 82-29 at one point. The only victory came in overtime against the Wizards, a game the Bobcats tried desperately to lose for their owner, only to be out-failed by Washington. The return to normalcy has seen Jordan make back some money, allowing him to finalize the purchase of a new Ferrari with a custom denim paint job.
"Michael's big thing is that he will not accept mediocrity," said a team source. "Mainly because it is impossible to make money betting on a mediocre team. He wants us to either win all of our games or lose all of our games. Nothing in the middle."
Video NASCAR's Brad Keselowski is the Worst Basketball Player and Athlete Ever
LeBron could probably be a good car driver.
Picture Fox News Has it in for Michael Jordan and Carmelo Anthony.
Not cool. Michael Jordan is on record saying that Republicans buy sneakers.
Picture Wyoming Loves Charlotte's Mike Dunlap Hire
Wyoming is known for its basketball acumen.
Picture Bobcats Now Selling Tickets Like They're Expiring Soda
Maybe I'd consider 10 years for the price of 1. Maybe.
Video Big Turnout at the Charlotte Bobcats Draft Lottery Party
Looks like they got about five fans for every win.
Opinion Transcripts: Michael Jordan's Interviews for the New Bobcats' Head Coach
- Malone
Thanks for having me in for an interview, Mr. Jordan. It's an honor.
- Jordan
You're welcome. But, look, I'll be honest here: I've never heard of you and I don't even know your name. I just had my secretary pick an NBA assistant's name out of a hat for an interview and she pulled your name.
- Malone
Okay. Well, I hope to make the best of this opportunity. And my name is Mike, by the way, same as you!
- Jordan
Bullshit. No one is like me. I'm the best there ever was. I will call you Phil, Doug, Larry, Paul or Dean those are the first names of the only coaches I've ever heard of.
- Malone
Okay.
- Jordan
That's right, okay, Larry. Say your name is Larry.
- Malone
My name is Larry.
- Jordan
I thought so. Now listen up, Phil, do you know how to break down tape?
- Malone
Definitely. It's my speciality.
- Jordan
Good. Then I want you to take a look at this.


