Cardinals Fan Taunts Albert Pujols

At least Pujols can afford a nice TV. Continue Reading →

2011 Was a Long Time Ago

Pujols, Tulowitzki and Lincecum? Those guys are the worst baseball players EVER. Continue Reading →

Classy Josh Hamilton Dedicates 4 HRs to the Memory of Albert Pujols

After hitting four home runs on Tuesday night, breaking the American League record for most bases in a game, Rangers leftfielder Josh Hamilton was quick to defer credit for his accomplishment. "None ... Continue Reading →

Pujols is Now Ajols

Cardinals fans aren’t supposed to use this kind of language. Disappointing. Continue Reading →

Frame-by-Frame Analysis of What’s Wrong with Albert Pujols

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Los Angeles Angels back away from billboard featuring Luis Pujols

6 Alternatives to the Albert Pujols "El Hombre" Billboard

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Cardinals Fans Now Think Albert Pujols Sucks

Maybe if the Angels got David Freese. Continue Reading →

St. Louis Reports That Former Selfless Humanitarian Albert Pujols is a Big Asshole

Longtime humble, hard-working, and charity-minded baseball superstar Albert Pujols is now pretty much the world's greediest asshole, claim many in St. Louis. "What a dick," ... Continue Reading →

Albert Pujols Ties World Series Record for Most Hits in Consecutive At-Bats

St. Louis Cardinals superstar Albert Pujols continues to put his name among the greatest players in the sport's history. In Game 3 of the World Series he joined another exclusive ... Continue Reading →

St. Louis Fan Has Cardinals Shirt, Ram Horn Head Tattoo

He is a diehard. And unemployable. Continue Reading →

Buttholes: The Baseball Jersey

No matter how many records he sets, "Pujols" will always = tee-hee. Continue Reading →

Vermont and Alaska Feel Albert Pujols and the Cardinals Are So Over

The people of Vermont and Alaska really know their baseball. Continue Reading →

Cardinals to Pujols: "We won’t give you a long-term deal because we know you’re 40 years-old"

The standoff between the St. Louis Cardinals and star slugger Albert Pujols escalated today when the team publicly explained that it will not offer Pujols the 10-year contract he wants ... Continue Reading →

Albert Pujols MRI Reveals Shrapnel from Old Vietnam Wound

St. Louis Cardinals slugger Albert Pujols received an MRI yesterday for his ailing back. The scan showed no structural damage, but did reveal what seems to be shrapnel from action in ... Continue Reading →

"No, Albert, my birth certificate is real. Yours though … I have my doubts."

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