Nationals Pitcher Todd Coffey is Not Physically Fit

Picture "Clown Question, Bro" Comes to Jeopardy

Don't get it wrong: Alex Trebeck is a hip cat.

Picture The Official Face of Washington, D.C. Fans

Picture Stephen Strasburg's Expiration Tattoo

If he smells okay, he can probably still pitch.

Picture Fat Brewers Pitcher Taunted by Ad

It's not like he wouldn't happily drink one on the mound.

Picture National Standings After Games of July 4, 2012: For Posterity

At least the Cubs are keeping things normal.