Opinion 4 Tribute Songs That Will Make You Hate All 4 Remaining NFL Teams
Chicago Bears: "Hest Is The Best"
Sample lyric: Hest is the best, meets the test, you know the man is blessed.
Poetic license is fine, but there are limits. You can't change the name of the person your song is dedicated to just to make it fit your chorus. And Devin Hester's nickname is not "Hest." Notice that in 1985 there was no "Payt Is So Great" song.
What this song says about the team: This isn't a tribute song for a quarterback or a defense or a star receiver. No, it's a song about a kick returner. When your most tribute-worthy player is a kick returner, that's how you become a home underdog in a conference championship game.
Performance notes: If you are a performer lauding someone's speed and athletic ability, you should try not to be so obese that you have to slump against a stage when you sing.
News Clay Matthews Thinking of Trying Out That P90X
"It's pretty popular," said Matthews of the workout DVD series. "I was at a party a few weeks ago and a guy there was swearing by it. He had only been doing it for a week but said he could already see a big difference. I'm surprised I've been able to get into the shape I am without ever doing P90X."
Matthews, who can bench 225 pounds 30 times, squat 500 pounds, run a 4.6 40 and has a 36-inch vertical, hopes P90X can "take him to the next level."
"I overheard a guy at the mall say he's in the best shape he's been in in years," says Matthews. "He was holding his daughter in his arms like it was nothing. And my cousin said her co-worker did P90X for 3 months and lost, like, 12 pounds. He sent in a YouTube video to their site and everything. I don't know if they used it or not."
Packers strength and conditioning coordinator Tom Corbick said he is trying to discourage Matthews from switching to P90X.
"This is like 1996 when Mark Chmura decided he was only going to do Tae Bo. He had the worst season of his career," said Corbick. "I hate when these fad workouts come along. Ooh! Eat right and workout hard for 6 days a week over a 90-day period … wow! What an ingenious idea!"
Picture Rich Rodriguez: The Jobless Coach with the Golden Playbook
RichRod thinks the man with the golden voice is Josh Groban. (via @ChadWalters40)
January 21, 2011 Column
Tweet of the Week
He'll Also Happily Smell Your Toilet Water, Girl
Link Former Florida Gator Will Hill is the King of Twitter
He's also the King of Morons.
Video Kinect Player Kicks Cat
Kinect is better than Wii because in Wii you can only hit cats with your controller.
Video Soccer: Now With Kung-Fu Kicks to the Face
Soccer is the beautiful game. As long as you're not blinded by a kick to the face.
January 20, 2011 Column
Overheard ...
The Game: Issue #1
Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym, tailgates and sports bars.
One of my least favorite parts of a football game is listening to "the coach from the bleachers." After the Florida-LSU game of this past season, I overheard quite possibly the most offensive quote I've ever heard from this fan. If you don't remember correctly, LSU ran a fake field goal to get a crucial first down late in the 4th quarter.
When we were walking out of the stadium, I overheard two of your everyday fraternity brothers talking about how Florida should have been prepared for the trick play. Apparently, one of them had played a little too much NCAA '11 and quickly pointed out that (and yes this is word for word): "it's Les f——- Miles! Urban has to know to call FG safe zone!" Thank you, coach-from-the-stands, for making me feel better about my knowledge and understanding of the game of football.
— Mark
I was at a hockey game and had to hit the bathroom between periods. The lines were really long and a guy a few lines over couldn't wait. So he finishes off the beer he's holding, walks over towards the sinks, whips it out and starts pissing in his cup. It filled all the way up, so he lets the last few streams out onto the floor. So gross.
A few seconds later, a security guy comes over and taps him on the shoulder. He turns around, still holding his cup of piss and tosses it at the security guy and runs. He didn't get far because a guy waiting in line near the exit dropped him with a punch to the back of the head. If anyone deserves the death penalty, it's this piss-tossing guy.
— Keith
