Archive

(Page 339)
February 17, 2011

Video Worst Soccer Free Kick Ever

They forgot to bend it like Beckham. Or even kick it.

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Filed Under   Soccer
February 17, 2011

News Auburn Fan Poisoned by Lethal Doses of Salt and Saturated Fats

A lifelong Auburn Tigers fan reportedly has just months to live due to what could only be considered intentional poisoning via years of ingesting cheap and unhealthy fast food, which is full of known toxins.

The fan, Ricky Joe Stutman, age 36, has been a regular attendee at Auburn sporting events since the mid-1980s. He is noted for his large, 5-foot-9, 423-pound frame. He also frequently has toilet paper stuck to him when he comes out of the bathroom.

The poisoning of Stutman first became an issue in late January when he called into the Paul Finebaum radio show while also ordering several bacon cheeseburgers in the Wendy's drive-thru line. Concerned Auburn officials later tested Stutman at the campus health center and found that his blood pressure and cholesterol were extremely elevated and that he could "have a heart attack at, like, any moment."

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Filed Under   NCAAF   Auburn Tigers
February 17, 2011

Picture The Downfall of Aaron Rodgers Begins

Fact: No quarterback has ever won a Super Bowl after partying with DJ Pauly D.

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Filed Under   NFL   Green Bay Packers   Aaron Rodgers
February 13, 2012

Opinion If Dog Show Handlers Were Judged Like The Dogs

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Filed Under   misc
February 16, 2011

Picture Volleyball is a Great Sport

I'd rate it a perfect 10 on the scale of … best … sports.

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Filed Under   volleyball
February 16, 2011

Opinion 5 Things That Would Change If Donald Trump Owned the Mets

#1 – Dramatic Roster Cuts

#2 – New Equipment

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Filed Under   MLB   New York Mets
February 16, 2011

Video Urban Gymnasts Perform Painful Friendship Ritual

"I just threw up blood—I think it worked."

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Filed Under   gymnastics
February 16, 2011

News Baseball Player Reports to Camp in the 4th Best Shape of His Life

Seattle Mariners veteran catcher Miguel Olivo reported to training camp this week feeling as though he is already physically ready for the 2011 season.

"I'm in the fourth best shape of my life," said a sort of noticeably trim Olivo. "Last year I was only in the 11th best shape of my life, so I really put time in the gym this offseason. I wanted to get into the top 5 shapes of my life."

Olivo entered his offseason workout regimen hoping to get into the best shape of his life, but soon realized that wasn't realistic.

"You can never be 18 again," he said. "I look at pictures of myself from back then and I had noticeable abs and I didn't even have to workout. I looked great. Now I'm 32 and have pretty much let myself go for more than a decade. So I can't turn back the clock. Especially when the off-season is really only three months. So I'm more than happy to get into the 4th-best shape of my life. You can't see my abs, but my gut doesn't hang out to the point it covers up my belt anymore."

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Filed Under   MLB