You can tell them apart because Tiki is the one who is unlikable.
March 10, 2011 Column
The Gym: Issue #9
Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at the gym? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about games.
I used to work front desk at a health club in college. One night when folding the towels and manning the desk I heard someone yelling for help from the men's locker room. Instinctively I dropped my towels and ran in the direction of the distress call. I round the corner and see a face all oiled up, peaked out from behind a door. As soon as the face sees me coming it slips back behind the door.
I open the door and look around and I see a figure behind the curtain to the tanning bed. I pulled the curtain back to find a young man completely naked dripping eyeballs to toenails in the free lotion the health club stocked for members. The lotion was literally dripping from this guy. He was yelling for help because his hands were so over-saturated with lotion that he couldn't turn the key on the wall to get the tanning bed lamps to start!
So glad you guys have this. Seriously, the amount of shit I hear in the Pentagon gym is ridiculous. Like today's little doozy: "Yeah, man, I gotta do this to soften my nipples or they'll chafe during the run." Or, instead of massaging your titties in front of folks, you could use runners glide.
Wait are they claiming the Islanders are a professional sports team?
Picture Script Ohio Begets Asterisk Ohio
I might get an Asterisk Ohio tattoo.
"We would obviously like Prince to raise his on-base percentage, but more than that we really just feel he could use the cardiovascular exercise," said Melvin. "I mean look at him. Christ. He's a young man."
Fielder led the majors in home runs in 2007 with 50, but has struggled with his weight since getting called up to the big leagues at age 21. He's presently listed at 5'10", 270 pounds, but is assumed to weigh considerably more. With the Brewers expected to contend in the NL Central, they need a big season from the two-time All-Star.
"With the way our offense relies on Prince, we need him to work the count and get on base," said Melvin. "He's at a really elevated risk for heart attack or stroke otherwise. I imagine he's already diabetic."
America came through in the clutch in this poll.