Video The Animated Tale of Jim Tressel Lying: "Vestocchio"
Cartoons are the only things Terrelle Pryor watches.
News Joba Chamberlain to Undergo Papa John's Surgery
"Nobody wants to have surgery," said Chamberlain, while struggling to pour a garlic butter container on a slice of pizza with his left hand. "But if you have to have one, Papa John's surgery is the one you want to get. I hope to be back and eating more than ever very soon."
A MRI this week showed that Chamberlain has a tear in a ligament in his right elbow. Team doctors believe it's due to a strain on the joint from the weight and quantity of food he shoves into his mouth with his right hand.
"I've seen a lot of MRIs in my day, and his was not typical," said Yankees team physician Dr. Christopher Ahmad. "The tear was not the kind that comes from throwing a baseball. Actually, the only similar MRI was one I saw when I was thinking of becoming a veterinarian. An overweight elephant had a tear like Joba's in its trunk."
The Yankees initially considered trying an arthroscopic procedure, but felt that could only make the problem worse.
"Due to Joba's diet, his joints are cushioned by a thick, cheesy, garlic butter substance," said Dr. Ahmad. "It's not a healthy diet, but it's actually not a bad joint lubricator. And we don't want that to drain out."
Video The Greatest NBA Analyst Ever
Now that I look, he's right about the Raptors logo.
Column
Tweet of the Week
Gilbert Arenas LiveTweets a Blind Date
From @agentzeroshow AKA Orlando Magic guard Gilbert Arenas …
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Would the two find love? READ ON!!!
Link Bob Ley Spits Warm Fire
He's the Jehovah of legitimate sports journalism. Boo-yah.
Opinion 8 Michael Jordan Career Moments (As Currently Remembered by Fans and the Media)
#1 – 1993 NBA Finals
What Happened: In Game 6 of the 1993 NBA Finals, with the Bulls leading the series 3-2, Chicago gets the ball trailing 98-96 with 14.4 seconds left. Jordan brings the ball up the court, but is stopped by Kevin Johnson and forced to pass. The Bulls eventually swing the ball around to John Paxson who hits a game-winning 3-pointer with 3.9 seconds left.
How It's Remembered: In Game 7 of the 1993 NBA Finals, as the final seconds tick away, Michael Jordan leaps off of John Paxson's back beyond the 3-point line, soars over the entire Suns team, and completes a 360-dunk as the final horn sounds to win the championship. He then high-fives Mars Blackmon at mid-court.
#2 – The Flu Game
What Happened: Fighting a stomach virus during Game 5 of the 1997 Finals in Utah, Jordan scores 38 points to lead the Bulls to a 3-2 series lead over the Jazz.
How It's Remembered: Despite a fever of 125 degrees, Jordan posts a quadruple-double against the Jazz, going for double figures in points, rebounds, assists, and number of times he actually died during the game.
Video Dumbest Soccer Goalkeeper Ever
The first rule of playing goalie: make sure the ball doesn't go in.
Column
Overheard ...
The Game: Issue #11
Ever hear something horrible and/or hilarious at a game? Send your submissions to OverheardSP at gmail. Or submit for future editions about the gym.
I was at a minor league game a few years ago and the beer guy came through our sparsely populated section. A lady a few rows ahead of us ordered some beers for her friends, starting drinking them and then tried to stiff the vendor, saying she didn't have enough money to pay what she owed. He was cool about it at first, telling her she could go to an ATM and pay him later, but she refused and then started getting verbally abusive with him. "Get a real job, you f—king loser," is one of the things I remember she said.
So eventually the vendor gives up and for the rest of the night when he came through our section he would say "Cold beer! Cold beer here!" Except when he got near that lady's row, he'd switch to "Cold bitch! Cold bitch here!" I hope he didn't get fired because it was hilarious.
- Jay
I was at a Braves vs. Reds game at Turner Field where I sat behind the center field wall. There was bunch of drunk guys a couple rows back heckling Reds centerfielder Drew Stubbs. They would yell, "Hey Stubbs, you suck! You're the worst centerfielder in all of baseball!" and other things that generally ruined the experience.
Finally, after one stood up and said: "Hey Drew Stubbs, could you do us all a favor and go back to Triple-A?", a little blonde girl stood up behind me, and she was no more than 6 or 7 years old. She turned to the drunk guy and says: "Hey Mister, could you do us all a favor and please be quiet?" The guys did as they were asked. Greatest. Thing. Ever.
- Bob
Picture Redesigned Ohio State Buckeyes Helmet
Just think what that helmet would sell for.
News Charles Barkley: "I'd have to have a few drinks before having sex in a car with a Miami woman"
"I'm telling you, I don't like these people," Barkley said during an interview on a Dallas sports talk radio station. "And some of the female ones are hot. Real hot. The kind of women I'd normally have sex with in a bar bathroom or nail out behind an Applebee's against a dumpster. But I don't know anymore."
Barkley infamously got arrested for a DUI in late 2008 while racing to get oral sex from a woman he had met an a Scottsdale, Ariz., bar, but he said today that if that incident occurred with a Heat fan, he could never forgive himself.
"That would be a personal low," said Barkley. "I can just see the headline: 'Charles Barkley Gets a DUI Going to Have Sex with a Heat Fan.' It could be the end of my career. I have never believed I'm a role model, but I also don't want kids thinking it's not shameful to have sex with these people."
