"We would have liked to see some results at this point, sure," said Royals general manager Dayton Moore. "But just like a knuckleballer, a knucklebatter can be a little hot and cold. Tim is in a cold spell right now."
Rogers, who grew up a Boston Red Sox fan, said he got the idea to try knucklebatting while watching Tim Wakefield pitch.
"If he had success pitching, I figured there might be a way to bring it to hitting," said Rogers.
"I just want everyone to know that I did not encourage Tim to be a knucklebatter," says his high school coach, Mike Thomas. "It's beyond stupid."
Starring: David Stern and Billy Hunter
Summary: NBA commissioner David Stern and elite team of league accountants and attorneys race against the clock to convince NBA players that the league is almost broke. Can they get the players to make serious concessions before the lockout wipes out the whole season?
A Good Old Fashioned Orgy
Starring: Nevin Shapiro and the Miami Hurricanes
Summary: It's recruit visiting weekend at Miami and there are no-holds barred to reel in the top prep players in the nation. Contains constant nudity, violent Jet Ski crashes and at least one abortion.
Videogame kids can oftentimes succeed socially with the normals, but sometimes they fail to do so because their digital realities taint their actual ones.
The Gamer gleans his knowledge of rosters and gameplay from his brief flings with various EA Sports titles, meaning that in his mind, Jake Delhomme can actually throw 25 touchdowns a game. Nevertheless, he'll play the role of a sports fan to get by with the fellas, but in his heart he's stomping anthropomorphic mushrooms, playing sacred ocarinas, and doing whatever else it is that keeps him coming back to that leaky beanbag chair in his basement.
The Icebreaker is someone in a leadership position who's required to be friendly to tons of semi-acquaintances on a daily basis but doesn't have the energy or desire to interact with them in a particularly personal way. Maybe a pastor or an R.A., the Icebreaker will jumpstart most of his conversations with the line, "Did you see the game last night?"
Whether or not he actually saw the game is irrelevant, as he won't stick around long enough to talk specifics. In most cases, the Icebreaker has a goatee, or at the very least a soul patch. It's still unclear what this indicates, but perhaps it's that all people with goatees are deceptive and insincere.
I didn't know it was possible to make a J.Lo song any worse.
"Since the public's reaction to the Nike Air Mag was so overwhelmingly positive, we decided to honor the other 1985 Michael J Fox blockbuster by auctioning off the chance for 1500 people to become post pubescent human/wolf hybrids, just like in the movie," Knight told the crowd of reporters at the shoe company's headquarters in Oregon.
Once ingested, the serum, simply labeled "The Wolf", turns even the most mild-mannered and seemingly average person into an exact replica of the film's cocksure and attitudinal protagonist. Nike's Head of Synthetic Lycanthropy, Steve Ford, said that replicating the wolf's basketball skills was one of the most challenging things the company's ever accomplished.
"It's not in a wolf's nature to even play a team sport like basketball, let alone be any good at it, so most of our time was spent honing the kind of skills necessary to get the truest feel of the character," he said.
Added Knight: "With this breakthrough, Nike is proud to be bringing together four extremely enthusiastic and passionate audiences: fans of Michael J. Fox, fans of werewolves, fans of being a teenager, and fans of becoming a teenaged wolf that plays basketball."
Studies say he won't call penalties on 10-percent of NFL players.
In the '90s, rookies were hazed by not being given steroids.