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May 20, 2013

Picture Chicago Loves Its Black Cocks

O. Duya?

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Filed Under   MLB   media   Chicago Cubs   NHL   Chicago Blackhawks
May 20, 2013

News Guy Who Normally Complains About the Same Teams Being in the Playoffs Now Complaining About Pacers and Grizzlies

Guy Who Normally Complains About the Same Teams Being in the Playoffs Now Complaining About Pacers and Grizzlies - Image 1
Your friend Jeff, who normally around this time of year is bitching about "the same teams always being in the playoffs," now has a stick up his ass about the Indiana Pacers and Memphis Grizzlies being in the NBA conference finals.

"Pacers and Grizzlies? Who gives a crap about them?" says Jeff. "I can't name a player on either team."

Jeff isn't too jazzed about the San Antonio Spurs being in the Western Conference Finals either.

"I'm so sick of them. They're so boring," he said. "And it's another small market team that no one gives a crap about," he added — oddly, considering just weeks ago he said David Stern and the NBA officials conspire to advance big market teams in the playoffs.

"I don't want to watch these nobody teams in the playoffs," said Jeff. "What I wouldn't give to see the Lakers and Celtics still around."

Jeff made this statement without irony despite bitching incessantly during the 2010 NBA Finals about having to watch the Lakers and Celtics. "Enough with these teams already," he said then. "The NBA needs some new blood."

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Filed Under   NBA   Memphis Grizzlies   Indiana Pacers
May 17, 2013

News Orb Pretty Bummed About Having to Spend the Weekend in Baltimore

Orb Pretty Bummed About Having to Spend the Weekend in Baltimore - Image 1
The handlers of Kentucky Derby winner Orb say the horse has been acting sad and lethargic in recent days after hearing its next race is in Baltimore at the Preakness Stakes.

"Orb has really be down since we mentioned where we were going to him in his stall," said trainer Shug McGaughey. "I had no idea that even horse had a bad impression of Baltimore, but I guess they do. Hopefully he can snap out of it and get his energy back for the race."

Stuart Janney III, the horse's owner, says he has tried to tell Orb that Baltimore is not as bad as its reputation.

"All cities have their warts," said Janney. "I told Orb about the aquarium there and, you know, the baseball stadium and … some decent neighborhoods, probably. But apparently one of our stall hands is a big fan of 'The Wire' and talks about it all the time. So no matter what I say, Orb thinks we're basically taking him to hell."

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Filed Under   horse racing   Orb
May 17, 2013

Video College Jeopardy Geniuses are Not Geniuses About Hockey

Ahh, yes. NHL superstar Sidney "Geno" Crosby.

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May 20, 2013

Opinion Flowchart: What Sports Media Job Is Best For You?

College seniors are graduating and heading into the workforce. Others who are already out of college may be considering a job in a new field.


One popular career is in the exciting sports media industry. But what sports media job is best for you? Follow this handy flowchart and find out!

What Sports Media Job Is Best For You - Image 1
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Filed Under   media
May 17, 2013

Video Massive Dunk Failure

Leave it to the pros, bros.

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Filed Under   NBA   NCAAB
May 17, 2013

Opinion Crackhead Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Does Sports on Crack

Before the baseball season started, Ford said the Blue Jays would be "good." As of his crack video, they are 17-24 and in last place.

Crackhead Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Does Sports on Crack - Image 1
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From Staff / May 16, 2013

Opinion The 10 Sexiest David Beckham Photos of All-Time

The 10 Hottest David Beckham Photos - Image 1

Here's Beckham going ham on a ham sandwich. So hot. (Not the sandwich, though. Ham is a cold cut.)

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The 10 Sexiest David Beckham Photos - Image 2

David Beckham and fire together. It doesn't get any hotter than that. If the flame had ignited his hair product, this would have been the hottest photo in world history!

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Filed Under   Soccer   David Beckham