11:10 a.m. Is so lazy he just lays underneath the model while she has sex with him.
11:30 a.m. Takes nap while the late-morning model shift changes.
12:00 p.m. Asks new model if his penis is still there, because he hasn't seen it lately thanks to his "huge gut." New model makes him aware of its existence.
12:30 p.m. Finally gets around to bathing, but just sits there yawning while receiving a tongue bath from the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders.
1:00 p.m. Lazily has a chauffeur drive him to an exclusive lunch spot.
1:30 p.m. Is immediately seated, possibly because he doesn't have the strength to stand there and wait for a table.
1:35 p.m. Has two appetizers and three waitresses.
Submitted by reader Matthew R.