#6 – The Hot Girl
She might be an intern, she might just be a young, attractive co-worker. But she looks really good in a pair of shorts and a tight t-shirt. Has she ever played softball? She looks really good in a pair of shorts and a tight t-shirt. Could it be argued that she is single-handedly to blame for at least half of your team's losses this season? She looks really good in a pair of shorts and a tight t-shirt.
Also, running. She looks really good when she's running. Can't forget that. She looks amazing when she's running.
#7 – The Softball Girl
She is awesome at softball. She played fast-pitch in school and is a great athlete. She routinely hits the ball over the heads of the opposing team's outfielders when they move in for her at-bats, assuming no girl has that kind of power. She's one of the only players on the team who can catch a fly ball or field a grounder without making it an adventure. Unfortunately for her, almost no one notices any of this because she doesn't look quite as good in shorts and a tight t-shirt as that other girl.
#8 – The Guy Who Brings His Kids
Lots of people on the team hate The No-Show, but at least he doesn't use the team dugout as his after-hours child care. In exchange for having a bat boy or girl at the game, now everyone has to watch what they say and do because little kid ears are present. Thanks a lot for making an after-work activity even more restrictive than being at work, fella.
The Drunk doesn't play by the G-rated rules, however. "Hey, Tom's girl — how old are you? Eleven? Dammit. You look older."
#9 – The Moron
Somehow this person grew up in America yet has almost zero understanding of the rules of baseball/softball. Tagging up? Not a clue. He runs on contact no matter where the ball goes. Throwing to the cut off man? He hurls it as hard as he can in the general direction of the pitcher's mound in every situation. And whenever he asks the score, he wants to know how many "points" each team has.
Why is he even playing softball? Who knows. He might just be so dumb that he thinks he's playing cricket.
#10 – The Boss
Competitors at the Special Olympics don't get more encouragement.
"Great contact! It will drop in next time!"
"Oh! Bad hop there. Not your fault."
"No worries. You moved the runner over. Productive out!"
Chances are he didn't start the company softball team to get the company name out in the community or provide employees with a fun activity to do together away from work. He probably started it because he really enjoys hearing people kiss his ass.
