Opinion

College seniors are graduating and heading into the workforce. Others who are already out of college may be considering a job in a new field.

One popular career is in the exciting sports media industry. But what sports media job is best for you? Follow this handy flowchart and find out!

Before the baseball season started, Ford said the Blue Jays would be "good." As of his crack video, they are 17-24 and in last place.

Here's Beckham going ham on a ham sandwich. So hot. (Not the sandwich, though. Ham is a cold cut.)

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David Beckham and fire together. It doesn't get any hotter than that. If the flame had ignited his hair product, this would have been the hottest photo in world history!

Few of us ever play professional sports. A few more play in college. But most everyone played sports as a kid. And if it was Little League or biddy soccer, every team had the same seven kids.

#1 — The Coach's Son

He might not be the most athletic kid on the team, or have the best stats (or any stats for that matter). But he makes up for it with smarts, hustle and determination. This, according to coach, is why he is the team's MVP this year. Now everyone give him a round of applause as he accepts his plaque.

Typical Position: Point guard, quarterback and shortstop. Whichever position is the most important for that sport, that's where he is, because this team cannot afford to have him playing anywhere else.

Where He Is Now: The heir to his dad's construction company, he's going to run it into bankruptcy within four months of taking over, yet still win Employee of the Month every time.

Directions: Just circle a word or phrase in each list, print it out, hand it in to a major media outlet and you'll be a published NBA columnist! You're welcome!

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Derrick Rose sat on the bench in a suit and tie again last night …

… like the huge pussy that he is.
… and probably had conflicted feelings about it.
… which had to kill him, because there is no bigger competitor in sports than Derrick Rose.

As has been well documented by now, Rose was cleared to return to the court by doctors two months ago. …

… So that's that. He can play. There is no debate.
… Yet an athlete knows his body better than a doctor does.
… But who's to say the team's doctors don't want to callously rush him back to the court before he's ready, the true state of his knee be damned?

HOW TO PLAY WINNING DRUNK GOLF, by Tiger Woods

Tip #1 — Don't hit the middle ball; hit all the balls — When Rocky Balboa was so punch drunk that he saw three Ivan Dragos, Paulie told him to hit the middle one. Not so when being liquor drunk and playing golf. You want to imagine you are hitting all three balls that you see. This will keep your swing in perfect plane at impact and follow-through, preventing a nasty hook or slice.

Tip #2 — Simplify your swing thoughts — Anyone who has played golf knows that you can have a thousand thoughts going through your head as you stand over the ball. Whereas when you're playing your best golf, your thoughts are pure, simple. Therefore … Helloooooo, alcohol! Have a six-pack before your 9:00 a.m. tee time and you won't have a single thought in your head.

Tip #3 — Learn the slope of the green — Putting is all about pace and reading the break. Being drunk allows you to read the break perfectly. Just puke all over the green and watch which way your vomit liquid runs. Now putt along that line. (And, yes, golf rules allow you to pick up and remove the chunks in your path. Loophole!)