Picture Minnesotans are Now Our Most Positive People
Perhaps the millions of their most depressed have walked into nearby lakes.
Column
Tweet of the Week
Of Elevator and Confetti Farts
This lady definitely broke wind in the elevator before I got on…so uncouth…but touché to her…give me that opportunity ill take it
— David Price (@DAVIDprice14) September 26, 2012
Nightly hypothetical: burp colors OR fart confetti
— George Parros (@GeorgeParros) September 28, 2012
Video NHL 13 Has an Outstanding Checking Glitch
So that's how Sidney Crosby gets those concussions.
Picture The Official Image of the NHL Lockout
Gary Bettman is too dumb to know how to operate an iPad.
Video Max Talbot does insanely impressive one-finger push-ups
Max Talbot trains with one-finger push-ups. Wow…and we were proud of our 10 push-ups a month regimen.
Opinion The 10 Excuses People Make for Their Failed Athletic Career
1. "It was all politics"
You think our country is a political nightmare? You should have seen this guy's high school. The athletic department was rife with "politics." And because of these vague "politics," this guy didn't get the playing time he deserved. Why would any coach keep a superstar athlete who could make his team win off the field? "Politics, man. Politics." Oh.
Where he is now: Getting passed over for promotions at work because of "office politics, man. Office politics."
2. "My coach was an idiot"
How incompetent was this head coach? He made the second-coming of Michael Jordan into a career backup who averaged 3.4 points a game as a senior. That is truly some poor coaching.
Where he is now: Working for an idiot boss.
3. "If it wasn't for my injury, things would have been different"
Bo Jackson, Sandy Koufax, this guy: amazing athletes who had their careers cut short due to injury. If it wasn't for the sprained ankle he suffered in 7th grade football, pretty much every sports record in history would be owned by this tragic figure.
Where he is now: Riding around in a Jazzy Power Chair because he weighs 500 pounds/his back went out.
Video Drunk St. Louis Blues Fan Cuts a Rug
He's taking the NHL lockout very hard.
Opinion 20 Ways the NHL Lockout is No Different than Having an NHL Season
1. No one likes Gary Bettman
2. Sidney Crosby isn't playing.
3. Maple Leafs fans are depressed.
4. Phoenix's arena is full of empty seats.
5. Patrick Kane is drunk.
6. Ilya Bryzgalov can't stop a shot.
7. No one is watching NBC Sports Network.
8. Rick DiPietro isn't playing.
9. The LA media isn't covering the Kings.
10. Everyone hates Gary Bettman.
