Picture Ladies: It's Tim Tebow's O-Face
This is from his new Nike commercial. OR IS IT?
Opinion 10 Tailgating Tips
Great. You brought a football to the tailgate. I might throw it around with you. A few times. Maybe. But I'm here to have some drinks and load up on food and hang out with people. That's really the entirety of my plans. I didn't bring my cleats. You see, I came here to watch football. Not play football. Okay? Cool.
Hey, relax with the football, guy! No, I will not play two-hand touch. No, I will definitely not go long. Under any circumstances. If you wanted to play football today, you should have made the team.
Go away, you drunk moron.
Your chili is not famous. It's just not. So stop saying that it is. See everyone here? They all know you. They all enjoy your chili. At least most of them do. Now, see the people one spot over at the other tailgate? I just asked them and they have never heard of you. More importantly, they have never heard of your chili. So there you have it: your chili is not famous.
And, really, it's not that hard to make good chili. You mix a bunch of stuff together. Then you make sure it's spicy. Boom. Good chili. You should really try to find something else in your life to be proud about. Everyone kind of pities you.
September 24, 2010 Column
Handicapper
NFL Week 3
Handicapper runs every Friday on SportsPickle during the NFL season.
- – - – -
1:00 p.m. ET
Tennessee at New York Giants (-3)
Vince Young shared some very important information with the world this week on Twitter:
September 24, 2010 Column
Stuff You Might Have Heard
Mothers Against Drunk Driving speak out against Braylon Edwards' taunting penalty
"This is yet another example of professional athletes assuming they are above the rules of the NFL," read the statement. "What Mr. Edwards did is a disgrace to the millions of young fans that look up to him. His poor judgment and reckless endangerment of the Jet's chances of winning is simply unacceptable for a person of his stature."
When asked what they expect from Edwards going forward, Mooney was adamant that he pay for his mistakes.
"We expect nothing less than a full apology to his teammates and coaches, and for him to run an extra 15 wind sprints at today's practice."
Edwards could not be reached for comment, but his agent said he understands the implications of his actions and is willing to accept full responsibility for it: "My client knows the damage he's done. He feels sick to his stomach about this entire incident. Seriously, he's been getting drunk every night just to numb the pain."
News Michael Vick a Changed Man, Says Desperate Eagles Fan
"Look, I wasn't thrilled when we signed him last year," said Rick Wahl, an Eagles season ticket holder. "But the man has paid his debt to society and from all reports I've heard, he's really turned his life around or is at least not murdering dogs anymore. And did you see that run he had against the Lions? Holy shit that was awesome!"
Eagles head coach Andy Reid named Vick the team's starter over Kevin Kolb this week, giving the convicted felon control of a team full of young talent.
"Michael is ready to take this step, he is ready to lead this team," said Reid. "A man who has a 105.5 passer rating and almost single-handedly beat the Packers in one half of play has to be living a moral and lawful life, right? I mean, the chances are pretty slim he's committing crimes again, no? Why would he want to go back to jail? It doesn't make any sense."
Vick's teammates are behind him, too.
"If Mike can help us win on the field, whatever he does off the field is not really any of my business," said Eagles receiver DeSean Jackson. "If anyone should be in jail, it should be Kevin Kolb for how bad he played in Week 1."
Wahl, the Eagles season ticket holder, also added that cross-state quarterback Ben Roethlisberger "is a piece of trash" who he "could never root for."
Picture Oh, I get it. Michael Vick killed dogs.
I guess newspapers have to get headlines anyway they can.
Video I can't wait to hear the 2nd chapter of this penalty explanation!
Maybe that's when they introduce more characters!
News Houston Texans Achieve Highest Power Rankings Spot in Franchise History
Many said it could never be done. But the Houston Texans used that doubt to fuel them and this week, for the first time in franchise history, earned a Top-5 spot in an NFL power rankings — earning the No. 3 spot on the SI.com rankings with a 2-0 record.
"You set goals at the beginning of the season, but I don't know if even we believed this would really happen," said triumphant head coach Gary Kubiak. "I'm just happy for the whole organization. It's a special day."
Video OMG. This might be the death of rap.
You stop rapping, we'll consider not texting when we drive. SMH.
