February 05, 2013

Poll Is Joe Flacco ELITE now that he has a Super Bowl title?

Is Joe Flacco ELITE now that he has a Super Bowl title? poll results
  • Oh, jeez. Here we go with this crap again.
  • Sure! I say he's extremely ELITE. Also, I say he's a flugelhorn because apparently words don't mean anything anymore.
  • He's MORE ELITE than Trent Dilfer, AS ELITE as Brad Johnson and LESS ELITE than Eli Manning.
  • I don't know. Was Dan Marino ELITE? Because Flacco has to be better than him now, right? Isn't that how it works?
  • Yes! I may not be a learned man, but I believe the definition of ELITE is: "one who plays at a high level for one month in five years"
  • If he isn't, Baltimore's Super Bowl title is permanently tarnished because determining QB ELITENESS is the whole point of the NFL now
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February 04, 2013

Video Ravens Fan Song is as Bad as You'd Expect and Much Worse

Feels like I've been stabbed in the ears.

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Filed Under   NFL   Baltimore Ravens   Super Bowl XLVII
February 04, 2013

Picture Church Sign Guys Knows God Isn't a Ravens Fan

God is probably a Jaguars fan. He's a big fan of the less fortunate.

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Filed Under   NFL   Baltimore Ravens   Super Bowl XLVII
February 04, 2013

Video Celebrating Ravens Fan Jumps from Building Into Tree

So it appears God favors both him and Ray-Ray.

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Filed Under   NFL   Baltimore Ravens   Super Bowl XLVII
February 04, 2013

Playlist January's Funniest Sports Videos

Video: 972 thumb Video: 1024 thumb Video: 986 thumb Video: 1026 thumb
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Filed Under   NBA   NFL   NCAAF   NCAAB   Soccer
February 4, 2013

News Beyonce's Nipple Falls Off in Horrific, Blood-Drenched Super Bowl Halftime Show Accident

Beyonces Nipple Falls Off in Horrific, BloodDrenched Super Bowl Halftime Show Accident - Image 1
Pop superstar Beyonce was rushed from the Superdome to a nearby New Orleans hospital Sunday night after her right nipple was torn off while performing during the Super Bowl XLVII halftime show, leading to a sudden stop to the show and significant blood loss.

Footage from the performance is still being reviewed, but early indications are that the singer's nipple became snagged by a metal wire in her top's chest support and then was violently torn from her body during a dance gyration. Whatever the cause, the incident shocked and horrified tens of millions watching on TV and resulted in shrieks and screams from those in the crowd, many who started vomiting or crying.

The singer laid on her back on the stage, her background music still going, and clutched her right breast, screaming: "Ahhhhh! AHHHHHH! My nipple! My nipple is off! Help! My nipple! MY NIPPPLLLLLEEEEE!"

Several feet away her nipple sat, looking like the chopped off top of an eggplant.

The incident is being called the worst wardrobe malfunction since Janet Jackson exposed a bare breast while performing at the Super Bowl halftime show in 2004.

"I know Beyonce is in a lot of pain right now, and we wish her a full recovery and we hope her nipple can be re-attached," said NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. "But at least her nipple was not exposed in a sexual way. We wouldn't want to subject young people to seeing something like that. And the FCC wouldn't care for it much either."

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Filed Under   NFL   Super Bowl XLVII
February 04, 2013

Video Idiot Ravens Fan Celebrates Super Bowl Title

He must have gotten that idea from Cam Cameron.

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Filed Under   NFL   Baltimore Ravens   Super Bowl XLVII
February 04, 2013

Picture Superdome Ad Suggests They Should've Tried Energy Alternatives for Power

Another possibility would have been capturing the heat energy from Ray Lewis' bullshit.

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Filed Under   NFL   New Orleans Saints   Super Bowl XLVII
February 4, 2013

News Super Bowl Champion Ravens Wait Nervously to See If They'll be Atop Season's Final NFL Power Rankings

Ravens Wait Nervously to See If Theyll be Atop Seasons Final NFL Power Rankings - Image 1
"We did all we could do," said Ravens quarterback Joe Flacco. "I just hope it was enough."

But was it enough? The Ravens won Super Bowl XLVII 34-31 over the 49ers, but the team nearly blew a 22-point third quarter lead and had only a 10-6 regular season record. It remains to be seen if all of that is enough to convince the NFL power rankings experts on NFL.com and on various sports media websites that the Ravens deserve the top spot.

"Do I honestly think they're the best team?" said one FoxSports.com NFL power rankings panelist who asked to remain anonymous. "Not at all. But I always put the Super Bowl winner No. 1. It's my policy. I didn't set up the playoff system. It's the system we have and, good or bad, it's designed to determine a power rankings No. 1."

Not all power rankings voters agree, however.

"I look at power rankings as something that weighs the current, but also looks ahead to the future," said an NFL.com power rankings expert. "All credit to the Ravens, but I think the 49ers are the team to beat next year. They're younger, they were better in the second half, and Colin Kaepernick is a future star at quarterback. I'm putting the 49ers No. 1."

The Ravens plan subdued celebrations until all power rankings are released, which is expected by Tuesday night.

"I hope it's unanimous," said Flacco. "Including from blogs that do power rankings. It's been my dream since coming into the NFL to be the No. 1 ranked team on every sports website and blog. I don't know if I'll ever get this chance again."

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Filed Under   NFL   Baltimore Ravens
February 04, 2013

Picture Joe Theismann is Still Providing Poignant Football Analysis

He needs to get back on national TV.

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Filed Under   NFL   media   Super Bowl XLVII   Joe Theismann