Column Stuff You Might Have Heard
Sports-mad son won't stop asking for a sports hernia for Christmas

December 10, 2009


There is one thing little Robbie Jackson wants for Christmas this year, but his father isn’t sure he can get it for him.“Robbie is a sports nut,” says the boy’s father, Thomas, of his 11-year old son. “It’s all he thinks about, all he talks about. Last year he wanted a Fathead for Christmas, and this year he has his heart set on a sports hernia. He says a lot of his favorite players have had one.”“Oh, man. I want a sports hernia so bad,” says Robbie. “All of my favorite athletes have had one.”But Robbie may be disappointed to wake up Christmas morning without intense pain in his lower abdomen.“Kids today just don’t want to put in the work,” says Mr. Jackson. “I keep telling Robbie that if he wants a sports hernia, he needs to try to lift really heavy things while turning his torso quickly and violently. But he won’t do it. He says he wants me to just buy him a sports hernia. But so far I haven’t found a doctor who will puncture the wall of an 11-year-old’s abdomen.”




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