Column Stuff You Might Have Heard
Naked Lebron says no one should wear a uniform in honor of Michael Jordan

A fully bare Lebron James took the court for a shoot-around today and chastised his teammates for wearing basketball apparel. "We owe so much to Michael Jordan," said James. "His logo made basketball shorts and t-shirts and jerseys popular. I think the league should honor him by banning all clothes." Lebron then easily dribbled through his teammates for a dunk. Cavaliers forward Jamario Moon says he will not honor his teammate's wishes — and also doubts James' sincerity. "Do you have any idea how homophobic most of the players are in this league?" said Moon. "He just wants to keep defenders away from him. It's clever. But kind of … gay."