"It's tough to see because I wish that would have happened here," said Jean Richard, a longtime Expos season ticket holder who was invented for this article. "I still root for the team to do well, but it's not the same without having them here."
Another hypothetical fan, Marie Duchesne, said she still wears Expos gear around town.
"I'll never stop loving baseball or the Expos," she said while standing on a surfboard atop a huge elephant in downtown Montreal because why not, she's made up. "We were close a few times and I think the Expos organization is what laid the foundation for what the Nationals have become."
Nationals general manager Mike Rizzo says the team still has a strong following in Montreal.
"Oh, yeah. Great baseball town up there," said Rizzo, sarcastically while making a wanking motion. "We get letters from old Expos fans all the time, saying they miss the team and wishing us luck."
Rizzo then, while laughing to himself, mouthed: "No we don't."
Hypothetical Expos diehard Max Marchand, who is the secretary of a hypothetical Expos fan club that is still active with more than 50,000 hypothetical members, said there is only one thing that can cheer him up about not having the Expos in town anymore.
"The hypothetical NHL season."