"I would like to apologize to anyone that we offended on behalf of the entire Washington Redskins organization," said team owner Daniel Snyer. "I mean, not the Redskins organization. Umm the whole NFL football franchise based here in Washington, D.C. I have reviewed the situation, and the offensive term was only used 2,346,187 times by members of this franchise. It is our hope that it never happens again, at least until after we get around to possibly changing the name."
Snyder said that the franchise has thought about changing its team name in the past, but other issues have always pushed it to the back-burner.
"We've also asked around and not everyone or even every Native American finds 'Redskins' offensive, so that should count for something," said Snyder. "Whoops. I said it again. Push that number up to 2,346,188."
While saying they are open to eventually changing the team's name, team officials also stressed that many critics of the name fail to understand that the term was originally meant as a way to honor Native Americans.
"That's what I don't get," said head coach Mike Shanahan. "Is it offensive to many now? If you say so. But then you're also saying that the rich, white people who founded this team in 1932 were not exactly well-versed on racial issues. I find that pretty hard to believe. America was pretty progressive back then. Think about it: 1932 was only 15 years before Jackie Robinson was allowed to play major league baseball. These wealthy white people would have known if 'Redskins' offended Native Americans or not. I mean, come on."
Snyder did promise that if he is presented with a scientific poll showing that 100-percent of Native Americans are offended by the term, he will change the team's name to the "Washington Casino Owners."
"Don't tell me that would be offensive, too," said Snyder. "Running a successful casino is hard. It would be meant to honor them. If they can't accept that, then it's their fault, not mine."