Well, that was Fun.
I like to go over to her house for milk and cookies made with pot.
News Detroit Tigers Okay with World Series Deficit: "We're just excited to get free Taco Bell tacos"
"Life is more than baseball," said Prince Fielder. "We're getting free tacos. What's to be upset about?"
Thanks to a Taco Bell promotion promising a free taco to everyone in the United States if a base was stolen in the World Series, the Tigers earned a free taco when San Francisco's Angel Pagan stole second in the eighth inning. The game was briefly halted as Tigers players stormed the field to celebrate.
"Dori-tos! Lo-cos! Ta-cos!" the Tigers chanted, lifting Pagan up into the air and carrying him around the field.
"I've got a team of fatasses," said Tigers manager Jim Leyland. "It is what it is. I'm hoping now that the tacos thing is over, they can finally focus on baseball. They've definitely been preoccupied so far with the taco promotion."
"Yeah, suck on that, you fkers!" Guillen yelled, peeling out of the parking lot in his Camaro. "Viva la Castro! Viva la revolucion!"
Guillen got off to a bad start in Miami in a preseason interview in which he stated that he respects Cuban dictator Fidel Castro. The manager later backed off of those comments under pressure, but his actions on Tuesday suggest his opinion hasn't changed.
The combative manager also took out a full-page ad in today's Miami Herald in which he thanked the citizens of Miami for his time in their "shit town full of disgusting Cuban sandwiches that taste like pig assholes. Drown yourselves in the filthy ocean waters of South Beach. Fidel > Miami."
Midwesterners are so crude.
"We're a team. Obviously someone has to do it," said Vogelsong. "But, sure, I wish it wasn't me. In the high-pressure situation of a Game 7, nerves are on edge. I don't know if I can pretend to think he's funny. If we go down a run and he starts tapping on the top of my hat, I could snap and bludgeon him with a bat."
Vogelsong has sought out advice from other teammates who have had the misfortune of sitting next to Wilson.
"Probably the main thing is to pretend you are somewhere else and just completely block out his presence and existence," said Matt Cain. "Beyond that, I would suggest every minute or so saying something about how beards are really funny. Once an inning when I had him I would mumble in a monotone: 'Brian, your beard is super hilarious and your eccentric antics delight me and the entire nation. Please don't stop.' That usually kept him content enough that he didn't try to do anything extra to really get attention."