Tuesday’s meeting between NFL commissioner Roger Goodell and former Patriots employee Matt Walsh came to a bloody and gruesome end when Goodell beat Walsh to death with a VHS tape – the St. Louis Rams’ Super Bowl walkthrough tape that had been missing.

            “Walsh produced the tape, one Goodell had hoped did not exist, and the commissioner just snapped,” said an eyewitness to the attack. “You could see he knew that his league was about to lose all credibility and that the tape’s existence would cement his position as the worst commissioner in sports history.”

            After Walsh handed the tape to Goodell and told him what was on it, Goodell briefly tried to compose himself, but then let forth a vicious blow across Walsh’s face. Knocked from his chair to the ground, Walsh was quickly mounted by the commissioner, continued smashing the offending tape into Walsh’s face, only stopping when the tape cracked apart. Then noticing that Walsh was still breathing, Goodell fashioned a noose from the now unspooled tape and hung the former video technician from the office ceiling until death.

            “You should have known,” an enraged Goodell yelled at Walsh’s lifeless body. “I destroy evidence. You are evidence. Now you are destroyed.”

            Once Goodell regained his composure, he called in staffers to strip the body and dispose of it and sent a league office intern with a similar look and build of Walsh to Washington, D.C. to meet with Sen. Arlen Specter. Then he spoke to the press and declared, with a wry smile, that SpyGate “is dead.”

            The commissioner is not expected to be charged with the murder and Walsh’s death may not even get much traction in the mainstream press.

            “No major media outlet is going to dare piss off the NFL,” said a source. “They all want in on that NFL TV money. And the NYPD isn’t likely to pursue it either. If they do, there go their comped Giants and Jets tickets. Matt Walsh should have stayed in Hawaii and kept his mouth shut.”