Colts receiver Marvin Harrison on Sunday became just the fifth receiver in NFL history to reach 100 career touchdowns and later in the game moved into third place all-time with his 101^st, behind only Jerry Rice and Cris Carter.

            But the accomplishment received very little fanfare. So little, in fact, that Harrison’s agent renewed his plea that the six-time Pro Bowlers try to raise his profile by being a complete dick like the other elite receivers in the league.

            “You look at guys like Terrell Owens or Randy Moss, had they gotten their 100^th reception ESPN probably would have interrupted their regularly scheduled programming to run five hours of coverage on it,” said Tom Condon, Harrison’s agent. “But with Marvin it hardly gets a passing mention.

            Condon says that if Harrison wants to be remembered as one of the all-time greats, he needs to take every opportunity to draw attention to himself and be a world class dick, a la Owens, Moss and Cincinnati’s Chad Johnson.

            “When T.O. gets his 100^th touchdown, he’ll probably break into a 10-minute dance routine and then pull up his jersey to reveal a ‘100 TDs’ tattoo or something,” said Condon. “That’s the kind of stuff that gets you on ‘SportsCenter’ and makes you big money in endorsements. Humbly flipping the ball to the ref like Marvin does just won’t get it done. In fact, it sickens me.”

            Condon points out that Harrison’s career numbers dwarf those posted by Owens and Moss over a similar time period and that he has played on more consistently successful team throughout his career than that more publicized duo has, as well.

            The only difference? Harrison refuses to act like a complete a-hole.

            But that’s something Condon has set his mind on fixing and why he has outlined for his client 10 steps to take to become more marketable – a list he titles, “Getting The Respect You Deserve By Being A Dick.” Included are the following:

1. Grow a massive Afro that suggests you scoff at convention.
2. Debut a new dance routine, of no less than 20 seconds, after the following: a touchdown, a reception of more than 10 yards, a reception of less than 10 yards that results in a first down.
3. Call out your upcoming opponent’s defensive backs in the media in the week leading up to the game.
4. Demand that a set percentage (no less than 40 percent) of your team’s passing plays be designed for you.
5. Even when you are getting more than 40 percent of your team’s passes thrown your way, accuse your head coach, offensive coordinator and quarterback of not using you properly.
6. After each loss, loudly proclaim to the media: “If this team wants to win, they need to get me the f-cking ball. I’m straight cash, homey.”
7. After each dropped pass, get in the referee’s face to tell him that he missed a blatant pass interference penalty.
8. Show up late for practices.
9. Threaten to hold out for a bigger contract less than a year after you signed your current contract.
10. Other general dick-like acts not laid out above.

But unfortunately, Harrison doesn’t seem inclined to follow his agent’s suggestions.

“I just want to go out every Sunday, play hard and hopefully help this team to a Super

Bowl,” he said.

            “That’s the kind of humble, selfless crap that’s destroying Marvin's career,” said Condon. “I’m not sure how much longer I can represent a client like that.”