12 Quotes from the First Game at Wrigley Field in 1914

wrig701“It’s been five long years for this city without a World Series title, but I’m sure the boys will pull through and win a championship very soon.” 

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“I do say, as confines go, these seem quite friendly.”

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“These new sporting grounds are lovely indeed. Benches to rest upon. Walking areas that aren’t thick with human waste. No luxury has been spared!” 

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“Don’t get me started on President Wilson and the fools in our Congress!” 

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“I’m glad there’s not a giant wall in this ballyard like at that abomination in Beantown. They’ll no doubt now be forced to tear down that calamity and build anew.”

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“I just overheard a woman giving her opinion on the abilities of the batsman. You can’t even vote, doll, what gave you the cockamamie idea anyone pays any heed to the musings on sport of your inferior brain?”

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“I don’t care for the growing push to track the batting average, or whatever it is they call it, of each individual player. The sport of base-ball is about gumption and moxie, not intellectual elites with slide rules.”

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“I believe the gentleman who just reached into the field of play is my haberdasher, Seymour P. Bartman.” 

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“A beautiful day, a remarkable feat of engineering for the viewing of base-ball, no worldwide military conflicts. The 20th Century is extraordinary and will go down as the peak of mankind!”

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“Check out the neck and wrists on that fair lass. I’d like to passionately kiss her after a suitable period of courting.”

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“I don’t think this team will be very good, but I care little, as I have imbibed several pints of frosty ale!” 

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“I hope Derrick Rose is healthy next year.”

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Also see … 

VIDEO: Cubs season starts fittingly with fastball to the crotch

VIDEO: Cubs fan dumps beer on her husband

SP’s Chicago Cubs page

(photo via)

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