Drake Schedules Emergency Photo Op with 1st Place, 5-2 Miami Marlins

Bkq7VXHIIAARKJnCanadian recording artist Drake is currently on a flight to Washington, D.C., to meet the Miami Marlins and take photographs with the team before their series with the Nationals begins. The Marlins are off to a fast 5-2 start to the season and are currently in first place in the National League East.

“I’ve always loved the Miami Tarpons,” said the rapper, changing out of a Kentucky basketball t-shirt on his private jet. “Hey! We need to stop at a sports store before going to the stadium,” Drake barked to an assistant. “I need some Tarpons swag.”

Drake says he has been a fan of the team since minutes after the NCAA Tournament title game when he asked an assistant to pull up sports standings to see who is good in other sports.

“One of the guys I hang with, that’s pretty much his whole job: making sure we’re rooting for the best teams,” said Drake. “Haters might call him my senior director of bandwagon awareness. He does that and is also in charge of making sure every club we go to is stocked with rosé wine and strawberry daiquiris. He’s basically my most important assistant.” 

The former “Degrassi: The Next Generation” star said he is excited to meet the “good hitter on the [Marlins] and also the good pitcher. I might work them into a song, so it would be really cool to find out their names so I can think up words that rhymes with their names. Like, if his name is Jones, I could go … ‘the best is Jones, he … has … lots of … bones?’ Yeah, bones. Just a little freestyle for you.”

Marlins manager Mike Redmond said he doesn’t know if the team will have time to meet Drake.

“He’s welcome to buy a ticket and hang over the railing to the field and try to get autographs,” said the manager. “I’m sorry, should I know who this person is?”

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