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I have been a Chicago Cubs fan since I was about five. I’ve watched them on WGN since then. I am also one who believes that regular people should not wear jerseys/uniforms under pretty much any circumstance – you don’t play for the team, they don’t wear your name on the front of their shirt when they go get new tires on their Escalades, etc. My mom is notorious for getting her Christmas shopping done very early – she brags quite often about having her shopping done in August or September – and she’s cheap. Like, “can’t shove a needle up her butt with a jackhammer” cheap.
Knowing that I’m a HUGE Cubs fan, she thought she’d found the ultimate gift for me for Christmas 2009 – a brand new Chicago Cubs Mark Prior Batting Practice Jersey, size L. Yes, Christmas 2009 – and Prior last pitched for the Cubs in 2006.
One Christmas my grandma gave me a Rawlings NeverFlat football… And an air pump for it.
I have two brothers, all 3 of us are big NBA fans. Being from Pittsburgh, we unfortunately decided to be Cavs fans since they were the closest team. During LeBron’s 1st or 2nd year in the league, my (bear with me) step-grandfather’s new wife (who lives in Cleveland) got each of us a replica Cavs jersey. Thinking they were LeBron jerseys, we were ecstatic. That is of course until we realized they were #2 Dajuan Wagner jerseys.
The year before I went to college, my mom wanted to get us an Alabama decor sticker for the car. She told me she saw a huge sticker with the letters U & A on clearance and thought it would be cool to go ahead and put it on the car herself as part of the surprise. Turns out, the sticker was actually an AU sticker for Auburn University and was obviously blue and orange instead of crimson and representing the University of Alabama. Although this originally made me laugh and cry, instead of scraping it off, I decided to get a bigger sticker of Calvin peeing to put right next to the Auburn sticker my mom accidentally bought. Next year she got my sister an enormous Alabama sticker to finish off the disgrace.
My parents got me tickets for the final Browns game of the season for Christmas 2010. It was cold, the Browns were 5-10 and they lost to the Steelers, 41-9. It was probably the worst that 30 bucks of Stubhub money could buy.
I’m a Vikings fan and one year asked my mom for an Adrian Peterson jersey. So Christmas morning I unwrapped a box and what should I find but a Shaun Alexander Redskins jersey. Apparently the company made a mistake when they shipped it out and my mom didn’t open the box when it arrived. She just wrapped it up.
She asked: “Do you want to keep that one or should I get the Peterson one sent?”
I felt too bad so I just said I’d keep that one. So now I’m the “proud” owner of a Shaun Alexander Redskins jersey. Thanks, mom.
Ever receive a crappy sports gift? Send your story to OverheardSP at gmail.
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