8 Sports Things You Can Really Buy Online

Tim Tebow Pillar Candle


Perfect for the sports media person with a Tim Tebow shrine. Buy one on Etsy for $4.50.

Potty Putter


Invite your golf buddies over to take a dump together! Buy it now on Amazon for $13.09.

Autographed Jerry Sandusky Autobiography

Own this piece of pedophile and serial child rape history! Some great person is selling this for just $129.99 on Ebay.

2004 Jeffrey Loria “Fan Favorites” Topps Baseball Card


Who says baseball cards aren’t still relevant in 2013? Get this “fan favorite” in near-mint condition on Ebay for $1.00.

Rick Pitino’s “The One-Day Contract: How to Add Value to Every Minute of Your Life”


Published in 2013, after Pitino’s sex scandal, this leadership book – Pitino’s sixth leadership book! – tells you how to “add value to every minute of your life.” One likely way to be more productive each minute: take just 15 seconds to have sex. The book likely has no tips on self-awareness, however. Buy it now on Amazon for $16.53.

Eli Manning San Diego Chargers Jersey


It’s probably never a good idea to order a player jersey before the NFL Draft is over. Get this Chargers memento on Ebay for $49.99.

Referee Lingerie


For all those people you know who have always fantasized about having sex with a referee. Get it on Ebay for $33.95.

UFC Youth Starter Training Combo


Perfect for the kid you want to have savagely beaten. Buy it on Amazon for $30.56.

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Also see … 

If College Basketball Coach Books Had More Realistic Titles

The Funniest Photos from the 2013 MLB Season