Report: Johnny Manziel Has Terrible Penmanship

Manziel-money_originalSeveral sources stepped forward today and accused Texas A&M quarterback Johnny Manziel of having poor penmanship. The sources claim to have seen autographs the Heisman winner signed and say his name is written in “a barely distinguishable scrawl. It appears he spent no more than a second or two writing his name on each piece of memorabilia.”

The sources would only show a cell phone picture of what they purport to be Manziel’s signature, but if it is indeed the quarterback’s autograph, the charges of poor penmanship are true. The revelation also raises questions about Manziel’s past schooling.

Mrs. Chuttlesworth, Manziel’s second grade teacher, refused to speak at length about her former student’s handwriting, but said that “Johnny had good penmanship in my class. If that has changed, it happened after he left my class. I just hope and pray he finds his way back. Good penmanship is very important. I think the decline in our nation’s penmanship has led to many of our society’s current ills.”

A review of Manziel’s student records at Texas A&M shows he has not taken a single penmanship class. Also, all of his written work has been typed on a computer. University officials would not comment on charges that they have let the prized athlete skate through with subpar handwriting.

“We aim to give all of our students a broad and diverse education and that includes good penmanship,” said Texas A&M president Dr. R. Bowen Loftin. “That’s all I will say.”

The NCAA reportedly is now looking into Manziel’s penmanship and whether it suggests he may even be unable to read and write.

“We’ll take the investigation wherever his penmanship leads,” said an NCAA source. “That is, if we can read any of it.”

Manziel’s attorney released a statement late today saying his client “has great penmanship and any allegations to the contrary are outright lies.”

Suspiciously, the statement was typed.