Lance Armstrong’s Mom Buys Him a Skateboard

Lance Armstrongs Mom Buys Him a Skateboard – Image 1
Lance Armstrong is no longer allowed to ride his bike, but his spirits were brightened today when his mom gave him a brand new skateboard after she got home from work.

"Lance has been pretty bummed. He really likes riding his bike," said Linda Armstrong. "But he got in trouble doing it. So I thought maybe he could try skateboarding. Some of the other neighborhood kids do that."

Armstrong says the skateboard is "pretty sweet" and that he was using it out on the driveway for an hour already.

"I can jump and almost land back down on the skateboard already," he said. "I can't believe I ever rode bike. Bikes are for little kids. I'm way too old for that now."

The one-time winner of seven Tour de France titles says he is especially excited about all the people who skateboard.

"I've seen them hanging out outside the 7-Eleven," he said. "They're pretty badass. They smoke and everything. I heard doing drugs is cool in skateboarding, so that's totally awesome. I wonder if these guys ever tried EPO."