From more than 220,000 reader votes on nearly 70 athlete names …
#25 – Dean Windass
Fun Fact: Windass, a striker for Scarborough Athletic, creates space on the pitch with his violently smelly farts.
#24 – God Shammgod
Fun Fact: Shammgod only lasted 20 games in the NBA and is now a teammate of Stephon Marbury’s in China. God clearly curses those who are named in vain.
#23 – Uranius Johnson
Fun Fact: Uranius Johnson majored in Sport Management at Marshall, not astronomy or taints.
#22 – Jim Bob Cooter
Fun Fact: Jim Bob was born in Tennessee and raised by a raccoon and an empty bottle of moonshine.
#21 – Misty Hyman
Fun Fact: 13.7% of American women suffer from misty hyman.
#20 – Chubb Small
Fun Fact: Small was on the same Marshall roster with Uranius Johnson in 2005 when the Thundering Herd ran their patented LOLfense.
#19 – Dick Butkus
Fun Fact: A Dick Butkus is still illegal in 17 states.
#18 – Fair Hooker
Fun Fact: Fair Hooker’s prostitute mother was twice honored by the Better Business Bureau.
#17 – Harry Colon
Fun Fact: Interestingly, Harry Colon’s asshole suffers from alopecia.
#16 – Dick Felt
Fun Fact: Following his playing career, Dick Felt sold and marketed Dick Felt, a felt penis covering designed to prevent chafing. He quickly went bankrupt.
#15 – Yoshie Takeshita
Fun Fact: In Japanese, “Yoshie Takeshita” actually means “Diarrhea Sandwich.”
#14 – Steve Sharts
Fun Fact: In English, “Steve Sharts” actually means “Steve Has Liquidy Farts.”
#13 – Kyle Sackrider
Fun Fact: First thing every morning, Kyle calls his parents to thank them for not naming him Dick.
#12 – Dick Pole
Fun Fact: Dick Pole made it to the majors thanks to his fastball, curve and ability to make batters giggle to the point of being unable to swing.
#11 – Destinee Hooker
Fun Fact: Destinee’s parents hope she will not only be a hooker, but a fair hooker.
#10 – Dick Paradise
Fun Fact: Paradise’s eponymous autobiography, “Dick Paradise,” has poor reviews on Amazon due to readers who felt the title was misleading and did not expect a book about minor league hockey.
#9 – Dick Shiner
Fun Fact: Believe it or not, Dick Shiner never missed an NFL game due to penile bruising.
#8 – Jack Glasscock
Fun Fact: Glasscock’s turn-of-the-century dildo factory, Captain Jack’s Glasscocks, was shut down after too many customers were injured when the glass broke.
#7 – DeWanna Bonner
Fun Fact: DeWanna Bonner has repeatedly turned down requests from the makers of “JuWanna Mann” to star in a sequel.
#6 – Johnny Dickshot
Fun Fact: Dickshot left the majors to fight in World War II, and thankfully did not sustain a gunshot wound to the penis, because that would just be ridiculous.
#5 – Chubby Cox
Fun Fact: Cox was born John Arthur Cox III, but if your last name is Cox, you may as well just go for full humiliation.
#4 – Ivana Mandic
Fun Fact: Ivana’s twin brother is named Ihava.
#3 – Dick Trickle
Fun Fact: If Dick Trickle is greenish or painful, he should see a doctor.
#2 – Rusty Kuntz
Fun Fact: A remedy for Rusty Kuntz is a bit of Dick Trickle.
#1 – Lucious Pusey
Fun Fact: Everyone agrees that Lucious Pusey is better than Rusty Kuntz.