Eli Manning Disappointed by the Quality of Prostitutes in Indianapolis

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New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning says he is enjoying his time in Indianapolis in the lead up to Super Bowl XLVI, but has found the "quality of whores here to be quite lacking."

Despite his humble, aw-shucks reputation, Manning admitted to media members on Wednesday that he has a "bit of a soft spot for hookers. Everyone has a vice. Mine is paying women for sex. I don't feel a need to apologize for it. If anyone should apologize, it's the City of Indianapolis for the low-level ass they're putting out there."

Eli said he began dabbling in the sex business at an early age.

"My brothers were older than me, so they had girlfriends before I did," he said. "But I wanted to be as big as them. And when you're in middle school in the early '90s, the only way to get sex was to pay for it."

Manning says he doesn't usually have discriminating tastes when it comes to night-walkers — "fat ones, skinny ones, toothless, trannies, orgies, I don't care. But I expected there to be some better quality options here for the biggest event in sports. You know, some high-end escort types. It's disappointing, but I'll try not to let it impact my play on the field."

If Manning is unable to indulge in high-priced hookers before Sunday rolls around, he says he may look for other outlets.

"My brother knows a good crack house not far from downtown," said Eli of his brother, Colts quarterback Peyton Manning. "He goes there a lot. I'm more of a whores man than a hard drug guy, but – hey, this is a stressful week. I owe it to my team to be relaxed and ready to go at kickoff."